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    Correction de texte/examen

    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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    Correction de texte/examen
    Message de tiifotos posté le 29-05-2011 à 11:07:34 (S | E | F)
    Hello,
    Pouvez-vous m'aider s'il vous plaît car j
    e dois rendre un texte écrit en anglais qui comptabilisera comptera pour mon examen.
    Je sais qu'il est long, mais j'ai vraiment besoin d'une correction, aucun proche ne parlant anglais :s

    Merci d'avance à celui qui aura le courage de tout lire...

    I AM THE MASTER OF MY FATE:

    A life where all events and happening are predetermined is it really a life? Are we just puppets of a theater which cannot change any situation? What is the purpose of the life if  nobody can choose its life with its own choice?

    At first, I think that the fate was created to ease people who made a bad choice in their life. Instead of saying that they might have done better, they say “it is the fault of the fate”, it is easier! In other words, the fate would be created by the losers. The following quotation says: « What separates the winners and the losers is how a person reacts to each new twist of fate. » Some people let themselves down by problems but life is not a bed of roses, life is made of failures and success. To stop after a failure, would mean not knowing the following success which were reserved for us. The failures are there to learn us to live better our life, without them, the life would have no meaning. We have to live our life as a game where we must have fun and do not often lose.

    Personally, I do not believe in fate. We have always a choice and as Mr. Nobody says: « As long as you have not made your choice, everything is possible. ». The only thing in which I believe in thefate, it is the death. I think that this one is already predetermined; we will die from one way or another, but the day of our death will not change. But the notion of fate stops there for me, the road which lead to our death will be made by choices which can totally change our life. But we have all the tools we need in our hands. If the choice was wrong, we have only ourselves to blame. I like the
    notion of future, we never know what tomorrow holds and it is exciting. If our life is already predetermined, the life would be monotonous.

    Certain persons say that their fate is in the hands of God. I do not agree with this view of things. When these one have to take a decision, they pray and confide to God to make a good choice. Each of their gestures would be God's will. Again, if they do not keep repeating on our fate, they keep repeating on God. But, I do not believe it until I see it. It is not a so called divine power which will can help me. « Nobody knows me better than me » and « If you want something done, do it yourself» are my mottos.

    Of course, we do not have always the choice. When we were little, the decisions were taken by other persons. Later, we become almost the master of our fate. Almost, because there are always things or decisions which were forced on us by the events. The diseases are not personal choices. Sometimes, the life forces its own choices on us.

    In conclusion, I would say that we are master of our fate. The life is made of failures, success, chance etc. The day of our birth, the countdown has started, the journey can begin. Everything is unpredictable, we have to write our own book up to the back page

    Tiffany
    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 29-05-2011 12:34


    Réponse: Correction de texte/examen de celiali2, postée le 29-05-2011 à 11:44:55 (S | E)
    Hello Tiifotos,

    Je viens de lire votre texte et ne trouve rien à redire ; il me parait correct et je n' y ai pas trouvé de fautes de grammaire ni d' orthographe .
    Je dois vous avouer aussi que je ne suis peut-être pas la plus qualifiée pour faire ce genre de chose dans une langue dont je ne maîtrise pas toutes les astuces .
    Je vous souhaite simplement bonne réussite pour votre examen .
    Sincèrement,

    Céliali2



    Réponse: Correction de texte/examen de tiifotos, postée le 29-05-2011 à 12:54:31 (S | E)
    Merci beaucoup, mais comme je l'ai fait par moi-même, je doute qu'il n'y ait aucune fautes, si d'autres personnes en trouvent, merci de le signaler



    Réponse: Correction de texte/examen de notrepere, postée le 29-05-2011 à 15:47:14 (S | E)
    Bonjour

    Bien sûr, il y a des fautes. Si j'ai le temps plus tard, je corrigerai votre travail.



    Réponse: Correction de texte/examen de tiifotos, postée le 29-05-2011 à 17:02:15 (S | E)
    Ho merci beaucoup, se serait super, j'ai été sur d'autres forums mais je n'ai toujours pas eu d'aide...et je dois le rendre pour demain



    Réponse: Correction de texte/examen de titibondues, postée le 29-05-2011 à 17:36:23 (S | E)
    Bonjour
    voici une faute que tu peux corriger

    When these one have to take a decision -->
    When they have to make a decision
    (prendre une décision)

    Je suis loin d'avoir tout lu

    Cordialement



    Réponse: Correction de texte/examen de notrepere, postée le 29-05-2011 à 17:41:14 (S | E)
    Hello again


    A life where all events and happenings are predetermined, is it really a life? Are we just puppets of (1) a theater which cannot change any situation? What is the purpose of the life if nobody can choose its life with its own choice (2)?

    (1) Une autre préposition: comme 'dans' en français
    (2) à refaire; cette phrase n'a pas de sens

    At first, I think that the fate was created to ease (3) people who made a bad choice in their life. Instead of saying that they might have done better, they say “it is the fault of the fate (4)”, it is easier! In other words, the fate would be created by the losers. The following quotation says: « What separates the winners and the losers is how a person reacts to each new twist of fate. » Some people let themselves down by problems but life is not a bed of roses, life is made of failures and success (5). To stop after a failure, would mean not knowing the following success (5) which were (6) reserved for us. The failures are there to learn (7) us to live better our life (8), without them, the life would have no meaning. We have to live our life as a game where we must have fun and do not often lose.

    (3) pas le meilleur verbe, mais il va
    (4) toujours pas d'article avant 'fate' ou on peut dire "the Fates" Lien Internet
    ce que va impressioner votre prof. (Notez bien le majuscule "Fate" dans le deuxième exemple)
    (5) pluriel
    (6) au présent
    (7) learn = apprendre; quel est le bon verbe?
    (8) ordre des mots; il faut mettre life au pluriel (attention, c'est un mot irregulier)

    Personally, I do not believe in fate. We have always (9) a choice and as Mr. Nobody says: « As long as you have not made your choice, everything is possible. ». The only thing in which I believe in thefate, it is the death (2). I think that this one is already predetermined; we will die from one way or another, but the day of our death will not change. But the notion of fate stops there for me, the road which lead (10) to our death will be made by choices which can totally change our life. But we have all (9) the tools we need in our hands. If the choice was wrong, we have only ourselves to blame. I like the
    notion of the future, we never know what tomorrow holds and it is exciting. If our life is already predetermined, the life would be monotonous.

    (9) ordre des mots
    (10) accorde


    Certain persons say that their fate is in the hands of God. I do not agree with this view of things. When these one have to take (11) a decision, they pray and confide to God to make a good choice. Each of their gestures would be God's will. Again, if they do not keep repeating on our fate, they keep repeating on God. (2) But, I do not believe it until I see it. It is not a so-called divine power which will can help me. « Nobody knows me better than me » and « If you want something done, do it yourself» are my mottos.

    (11) A decision is "made" not "taken"

    Of course, we do not have always (9) the choice. When we were little, the decisions were taken by other persons (12). Later, we become almost the master of our fate. Almost, because there are always things or decisions which were forced on us by the events. The diseases are not personal choices. Sometimes, the life forces its own choices on us.

    (12) one person, two or more people

    In conclusion, I would say that we are master (5) of our fate. The life is made of failures, success (5), chance etc. On the day of our birth, the countdown has started (13), the journey can begin. Everything is unpredictable, we have to write our own book up to the back (14) page.

    (13) Le present perfect ne convient pas dans le contexte
    (14) the "last" page



    Réponse: Correction de texte/examen de tiifotos, postée le 29-05-2011 à 17:41:33 (S | E)
    Mon texte a été corrigé, merci à vous tous




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