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Message de evy25 posté le 05-03-2014 à 17:14:14 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je prépare mon oral de bac anglais et voici mon texte sur la notion Idée de progrès. J'aimerais savoir ce que vous en pensez s'il vous plaît.
Merci pour vos réponses.
INTRO
I’m going to talk about « Idea of progress ». To begin with, I’d like to state a definition of progress. Progress is the idea that the world and the society can evolve positively in therms of sciences, technology, modernization, living condition, etc. However, the idea of progress is still debate between those who consider that it’s beneficial and those for whom it’s harmful. Now, I propose we look at a question : « Should we fear progress ? »
I. First of all, I think progress is essential to evolve. History is made of progress and evolution that have allowed the world to be what it’s today. Thanks to advances in sciences, medicine has become much more efficient and accessible. For example, in an article of the Time, « My body, my laboratory », a wheeled doctor explained haw he managed to connect his wheelchair to his brain in order to control it. Robotics, science, technology and biology allow progress. Wonderful inventions are due to advances such as the internet or the development of robots like the japan robot which look like a woman and which is able to reflect and make some move like humans.
II. But progress cab be dangerous if not controlled or used for bad. In the film « Welcome to Gattaca », science and technology have led to a world without emotions, without values and whiteout freedom. Many debates arise about the progress of science as : « Should parents be able to choose their baby’s gender ? » from an article of the MailOnline. There may be some good reasons to accept, but an ethical problem arises and a larger question arises : Where are the limits of progress ?
CONCLUSION
In conclusion, I’d say progress is neither all good or all bad. Put into the hands of human beings, that knowledge can be used for medicine or great advances. It’s not scientific knowledge that is either good or evil, but the application of it.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 05-03-2014 23:01
Message de evy25 posté le 05-03-2014 à 17:14:14 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je prépare mon oral de bac anglais et voici mon texte sur la notion Idée de progrès. J'aimerais savoir ce que vous en pensez s'il vous plaît.
Merci pour vos réponses.
INTRO
I’m going to talk about « Idea of progress ». To begin with, I’d like to state a definition of progress. Progress is the idea that the world and the society can evolve positively in therms of sciences, technology, modernization, living condition, etc. However, the idea of progress is still debate between those who consider that it’s beneficial and those for whom it’s harmful. Now, I propose we look at a question : « Should we fear progress ? »
I. First of all, I think progress is essential to evolve. History is made of progress and evolution that have allowed the world to be what it’s today. Thanks to advances in sciences, medicine has become much more efficient and accessible. For example, in an article of the Time, « My body, my laboratory », a wheeled doctor explained haw he managed to connect his wheelchair to his brain in order to control it. Robotics, science, technology and biology allow progress. Wonderful inventions are due to advances such as the internet or the development of robots like the japan robot which look like a woman and which is able to reflect and make some move like humans.
II. But progress cab be dangerous if not controlled or used for bad. In the film « Welcome to Gattaca », science and technology have led to a world without emotions, without values and whiteout freedom. Many debates arise about the progress of science as : « Should parents be able to choose their baby’s gender ? » from an article of the MailOnline. There may be some good reasons to accept, but an ethical problem arises and a larger question arises : Where are the limits of progress ?
CONCLUSION
In conclusion, I’d say progress is neither all good or all bad. Put into the hands of human beings, that knowledge can be used for medicine or great advances. It’s not scientific knowledge that is either good or evil, but the application of it.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 05-03-2014 23:01
Réponse: Bac /Idea of progress de mizykoola, postée le 05-03-2014 à 20:44:15 (S | E)
Bonjour evy25,
Ton texte me parait bien surtout qu'il possède plein d'exemples ce qui est toujours apprécié.
Cependant quelques remarques :
- je trouve tes phrases un peu trop compliquées pour un oral, tu gagnerai à faire des phrases plus simples et donc plus facile à suivre pour ton public
- ma prof d'anglais me dis toujours de ne pas conclure par "In conclusion" mais plutôt par "To conclude" donc je te le dis
- pour donner deux points de vue tu peux utiliser "on the one hand" mettre ta partie I. puis "on the other hand" et mettre ta partie II. maintenant ça c'est du détail
- hésite pas à bien bosser la prononciation avec les outils du site ou bien, si tu as des hésitations sur un mot en particulier le site "howjsay" est super
Voilà, si j'ai pu un peu t'aider tant mieux
Bonne chance pour ton oral en tout cas
Réponse: Bac /Idea of progress de bluduck2, postée le 06-03-2014 à 10:05:21 (S | E)
Hello evy 25 , Quelques remarques
--ligne 2 : in terms of science
--ligne 2 ...still debated or/still a debate .
--ligne 7 adjectif Japanese (robot)
--ligne 9 Faites suivre "bad " d'un nom
--Je suggère "As a conclusion" et aussi de bien préparer ce passage (très)écrit pour l'oral . All the best from Bluduck2
Réponse: Bac /Idea of progress de here4u, postée le 06-03-2014 à 10:36:00 (S | E)
Hi, evy !
I'll just add a few misprints : 'can be' and your "whiteout" which is of course 'without' (Beware of the pronounciation!)
More important is the missing -s (the Japanese robot which useS) it must be pronounced ...
I would also add that you shouldn't learn this piece of written English by heart ...(nothing is more irritating !) If you do, the teacher will interrupt you and start asking (tricky) questions about what you didn't say and what he/she wants to know ...
You should also try to have some valuable examples of Progress and some harmful ones in mind ...
In all cases, don't forget that we know students are scared at an oral exam ... It's normal ... look at the person you're talking to, not at your paper ... and you're more than allowed to "hesitate", saying "errrr", "well", 'how shall I put it?' (to yourself, of course but in a loud voice ... ), thus proving that you're really talking and not reciting !
Relax ! and go for a good mark ! All the best !
here4u
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Modifié par lucile83 le 06-03-2014 10:56
Mise en forme standard
Réponse: Bac /Idea of progress de evy25, postée le 06-03-2014 à 21:44:27 (S | E)
Merci pour vos réponses !
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Modifié par lucile83 le 07-03-2014 08:00
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