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Favourite place/aide

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Favourite place/aide
Message de lucie47 posté le 20-09-2015 à 11:29:14 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous,
Je dois faire le résumé d'une compréhension orale écoutée lors du cours précédent.
J'ai totalement terminé mais j'aurais besoin que quelqu'un m'indique mes fautes. Merci par avance, ci -joint le texte. Il est un peu long mais si vous pouvez corriger une partie, c'est déjà bien

Let me start with Steve, who are originary from India. His favorite place to travel in the US is Southern Florida, because he thinks that it's so beautiful. Indeed, there are ocean's everywhere in which he likes to boating or jet skiing. As for Jaime, he prefers to go to Deseret in Utah along the Green River, for 5 ou 6 days. In the Summer, he enjoys sleeping outside without a tent and goes canoeing. What attracts him is the landscape with long sandy white beaches and big deep canyon.
The second interview is a little bit different and very short. We don't know the name of the person. We just learn that he usually goes in Southern Oregon coast and Northern California coast. He gives us some pretty simple reason like "it's georgous" or "it's right on the ocean". He's not very talkative with the journalist. Now I will talk about Katy, who has a great time in New York. When she was young, she went to school in Providence and had a lot of fun, went to bars, played in Central Park. For she, New York is a lot bigger than most of the cities.
Finally, we will look on fourth interview. Favorite Tim'places is San Francisco. Indeed, he's fond of original architecture and like rolling hills of the city.
According to him, there's a lot happening because it's extremely diverse and it's a cosmopolitan city. In brief, there life is not limited!

Ok, I think I said everything.
Now, we will alalyse the results of this survey.
Two people out of five prefer to go to the city. In general, they love meeting people, going out and hanging around the town. After that, many people adore traditional holidays. Most are attracted to sun, sea and sandy white beaches. Whereas, Jamie prefers original places like desert and he's looking for more adventurous experience. Nealy all of them, attached importance to the landscape, visual and especially nature. Two words are often used to describe their paradise, specific to each: "gorgeous" and "beautiful". I think it sums up the wonderful places that have been described all along the interviews.

To close this recap, I will give my opinion. I share Kate's opinion because my dream is to go to New York, one day.
If I could go to New York, I would visit all the city from top to bottom.
I would go in lots of museums and like to see the statue of liberty, of course.
Like Kate, I would go to Central Park, have fun and discover the American way of life, their culture.
In my opinion, New York is a “model city”.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 20-09-2015 16:43


Réponse: Favourite place/aide de bluestar, postée le 20-09-2015 à 13:59:31 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Erreurs en bleu

Let me start with Steve, who are originary (orth.) from India. His favorite place to travel in the US is Southern Florida, because he thinks that it's so beautiful. Indeed, there are ocean's oceans everywhere in which he likes to boating(infinitif) or jet skiing(idem). As for Jaime, he prefers to go to Deseret in Utah along the Green River, for 5 ou 6 days. In the Summer, he enjoys sleeping outside without a tent and goes canoeing. What attracts him is the landscape with long sandy white beaches and big deep canyon(pluriel).
The second interview is a little bit different and very short. We don't know the name of the person. We just learn that he usually goes in(mauvaise prep.)Southern Oregon coast and Northern California coast. He gives us some pretty simple reason like "it's georgous(orth. a verifier)" or "it's right on the ocean". He's not very talkative with the journalist. Now I will talk about Katy, who has(temps?) a great time in New York. When she was young, she went to school in Providence and had a lot of fun, went to bars, played in Central Park. For she, New York is a lot bigger than most of the cities.
Finally, we will look on(autre preposition) the fourth interview. Favorite Tim'places (ordre des mots: aussi manque un s apres Tim) is San Francisco. Indeed, he's fond of.. (article).. original architecture and like (conjugaison)... (article).. rolling hills of the city.
According to him, there's a lot happening because it's extremely diverse and it's a cosmopolitan city. In brief, there life is not limited!

Ok, I think I said everything.
Now, we will alalyse(orth.) the results of this survey.
Two people out of five prefer to go to the city. In general, they love meeting people, going out and hanging around the town. After that, many people adore traditional holidays. Most are attracted to sun, sea and sandy white beaches. Whereas, Jamie prefers original places like.. (article).. desert and he's looking for a more adventurous experience. Nealy (orth. a verifier)all of them, attached importance to the landscape, visual('visual' est un adjectif,ou est le nom?) and especially nature. Two words are often used to describe their paradise, specific to each: "gorgeous" and "beautiful". I think it sums up the wonderful places that have been described all along the interviews.

To close this recap, I will give my opinion. I share Kate's opinion because my dream is to go to New York, one day.
If I could go to New York, I would visit all the city from top to bottom.
I would go in lots of museums and like to see the statue of liberty (majuscules), of course.
Like Kate, I would go to Central Park, have fun and discover the American way of life, their culture.
In my opinion, New York is a “model city”.



Réponse: Favourite place/aide de here4u, postée le 20-09-2015 à 14:19:09 (S | E)
Hello !

Let me start with Steve, who are originary from India. His favorite place to travel in the US is Southern Florida, because he thinks that it's so beautiful. Indeed, there are ocean's everywhere in which he likes to boating or jet skiing. As for Jaime, he prefers to go to Deseret in Utah along the Green River, for 5 ou 6 days. In the Summer, he enjoys sleeping outside without a tent and goes canoeing. What attracts him is the landscape with long sandy white beaches and big deep canyon.
The second interview is a little bit different and very short. We don't know the name of the person. We just learn that he usually goes in Southern Oregon coast and XXX Northern California coast. He gives us some pretty simple reason like "it's georgous" or "it's right on the ocean". He's not very talkative with the journalist. Now I will talk about Katy, who has a great time in New York. When she was young, she went to school in Providence and had a lot of fun, went to bars, played in Central Park???in Providence?. For she, New York is a lot bigger than most of the cities.
Finally, we will look on X fourth interview. Favorite Tim'places is San Francisco. Indeed, he's fond of original architecture and like rolling hills of the city.
According to him, there's a lot happening because it's extremely diverse and it's a cosmopolitan city. In brief, there life is not limited! ???

Ok, I think I said everything.
Now, we will alalyse the results of this survey.
Two people out of five prefer to go to the city. In general, they love meeting people, going out and hanging around the town. After that, many people adore traditional holidays. Most are attracted toXXX sun, XXX sea and sandy white beaches. Whereas, Jamie prefers original places like XXX desert and he's looking for more adventurous experience. Nealy all of them, attached importance to the landscape, visual and especially nature. Two words are often used to describe their paradise, specific to each: "gorgeous" and "beautiful". I think it sums up the wonderful places that have been described all along the interviews.

To close this recap, I will give my opinion. I share Kate's opinion because my dream is to go to New York, one day.
If I could go to New York, I would visit all the city from top to bottom.
I would go in lots of museums and XXX like to see the statue of liberty, of course.
Like Kate, I would go to Central Park, have fun and discover the American way of life, their (whose?)culture.
In my opinion, New York is a “model city”.





Réponse: Favourite place/aide de violet91, postée le 20-09-2015 à 18:22:18 (S | E)
Hello ,
Shall I add some more ?
- En deuxième année de collège , les professeurs attendent de l'anglais britannique et non des américanismes = favourite , par exemple qui a d'ailleurs été rectifié comme titre de sujet .
-A little ' bit ' n'est guère apprécié .
- Vous choisissez le présent simple ( et c'est du niveau ) pour l'expérience de chacun des trois personnages ; n'utilisez le simple past que pour l'évocation de l'enfance du 3ème : went to school ...enjoyed ...played. Respect du temps choisi . Pour les généralités , aussi : le présent simple .
- outside ? Vous devez vouloir dire en plein air , à ciel ouvert ...? In the open air .
- on ne vous enseigne pas le prénom , on vous le fait savoir = entendre . Not to learn .
- as for Katy : remettez en ordre chronologique ses activités à Providence .
- to go implique un mouvement vers Oregon 'went to school .' Vous pourriez dire -aller et séjourner en - en revanche .
- l'ordre de 'long sandy white beaches ' n'est pas conforme à la règle : forme-couleur -matériau ( cf.ce site )
- N'assimilez pas Providence à New York ; c'est la capitale de Rhode Island et à ~ 250 km de là .
- South Florida / North California - la terminaison -'ern' n'est pas nécessaire .
- Comme beaucoup d'élèves , vous pensez à George ..pour gorgeous ! Vous placez le 'e' trop tôt'.
- 'la plupart des'( most) villes se dit en deux mots .
- le groupe 'les villes favorites de Tim ' est désorganisé ; Tim's (génitif )est le déterminant n°1 . Il se place comme l'article défini ou l'adjectif possessif .
- San Francisco a son architecture spécifique , originale en effet ( meilleur mot pour cela ?) : elle est définie .
- ne pas confondre 'there' adverbe de lieu et l'adjectif possessif pluriel 'their ' .
- Voulez -vous dire qu'il se passe 'plein de choses ', qu'il y a beaucoup à faire ou qu'il y a de nombreux événements marquants = a happening pour un .- Vous ne pouvez pas proposer 'their culture ' ...vous n'avez pas vraiment encore parlé du peuple américain .

Je n'ai pas forcément mis dans le bon ordre ni tout vu ...car je fonctionne de mémoire . Vérifiez bien l'orthographe des mots ,ce sont des fautes si évitables .
Ce n'est quand -même pas mal du tout . Good luck !




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