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Notion/Spaces and exchanges

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Notion/Spaces and exchanges
Message de margaux18 posté le 10-02-2017 à 15:21:50 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
j'ai rédigé ma notion pour le Bac d'anglais "Spaces and Exchanges". Cependant, j'ai dû faire des fautes donc si vous pouviez m'aider à me corriger je vous en serai reconnaissante.
Merci d'avance!

The notion I’m going to deal is Spaces and Exchanges. To begin with, I’d like to give a definition of the notion: an exchange is an act of giving and receiving something else in return. It can also be seen as a continuous movement or circulation. There are different kinds of exchanges like media, people, trade... And our world is built on the exploration and conquest of new spaces. To illustrate the notion, I have chosen to talk about immigration in the USA. Mexican immigration is still today a big issue in the United States, it has been the case for many years with President Busch, Clinton or Obama for instance. So we can wonder to what extent does the Mexican immigration impact the US and the American way of life. Firstly, we are going to talk about the measures which have been taken by America to try to protect the border and to stop illegal immigrants from coming and secondly we are going to show that changing have been happening in the American society due to the rising level of Hispanics.

To begin, the border between Mexico and the USA is the most crossed over in the world. The American’s government wants to make the border more secure and uneasy to cross. There are around 312 millions of attempts to cross the border every year and it develops drug deals and cartels. We learnt in class in a listening comprehension that US border agents had even discover illegal constructions like tunnels. Some agents have been aggressed or killed in the line of duty. So the US government has decided to build a fence to prevent immigrants from entering the USA illegally.
Mexican people leave Mexico to have a higher standard of living with med facilities and to have a better future and an education for their children. Furthermore, Mexico is struck by unemployment. The USA appears as a land of opportunities. People live for the US to get papers and then to go back to Mexico and retire. They cross the Rio Grande thanks to smugglers, they are piled in miserable trucks and they can’t move. Thus, they are worried and ill-treated.
Obama willing to increase the controls but to make it easier for those already in America to get papers. He managed to stabilize relations with Mexico and he talked with Mexico’s President trying to find compromises and mutual agreements, he managed to provide a mechanism so that families are not separated who have been here for a long time. Thanks to him, the Congress passed a law that allowed 2,7 million illegal people to obtain a green card.
But we saw in an article from The Star written by Marina Jimenez that with Trump, there is an evolution of the relationship between Mexico and the US because he wants to build a wall and the wants Mexico to pay for it. Yet the president of Mexico replied on twitter he would never pay for that “racist monument”. So, there are some increasing hot tensions and Mexicans are still-shocked that the US is now a mercantilist predator. Mexico will become less stable which lead to American national insecurity because there will be more and more refugees.
Secondly, the increasing of Mexican immigrants in the US made grow changes. Indeed, we can notice the emergence of a new culture, the Spanglish. We learnt in class how to speak Spanglish with a video of Flama. We have to switch between English and Spanish. For instance, we take the English word to dress up in Spanish. It shows the influence of Spanish over the English language. It is also a commercial strategy to target the Latino community in the USA. Indeed, when big American firms want to sell their products to the Spanish-speaking community, they often use Spanglish in their ads.
An other changement to note is the emergence of a cheap workforce. When they reach the US, the Mexican immigrants are doomed to do painful and menial jobs low skilled and with low wages like dishwasher, gardener or cleaning lady. Some people think that Mexicans are taking away jobs from American citizens but Americans workers would not automatically accept to work in such conditions.

Undocumented workers represent 5 percents of the American workforce, so it will impoverish the American economy to get them out. The US needs Latino workers and the wall doesn’t stop them getting through. In addition, in some Southern states like Florida or Arizona, whites are becoming a minority because of the increasing of Mexican immigration. This migration enables economic exchanges : while Mexicans are given the opportunity to improve their living conditions, the US economy benefits from their adaptability.

To conclude migration illustrates the notion Spaces and Exchanges because it creates flows of people and cultures circulating and linking different places around the world.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 10-02-2017 23:47


Réponse : Notion/Spaces and exchanges de laure95, postée le 11-02-2017 à 11:32:31 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- So we can wonder to what extent does the Mexican immigration impact the US and the American way of life: question indirecte: mot interogatif + sujet + verbe conjugué.
- we are going to show that changing (pas la bonne forme du mot)have been happening (présent perfect simple) in the American society

- To begin (with)
- The American’s (pas de 's)government wants to make
- We learnt in class in a listening comprehension that US border agents had even discover (participe passé) illegal constructions
- med facilities: ?
- People live for the US: mal dit.
- He managed to stabilize (the) relations with Mexico
- so that families are not separated: pas la bonne forme du verbe.
- the wants
- Mexico will become less stable which lead (faute de conjugaison) to American national insecurity

- Secondly, the increasing (pas la bonne forme du mot)of Mexican immigrants in the US made grow (pas la bonne forme du mot)changes.
- An other changement (mot français)
- Americans (pas de "s") workers

- Undocumented workers represent 5 percents (pas de "s")of the American workforce,
- the increasing

Conclusion trop courte: il faut résumer les parties et répondre à la problématique.




Réponse : Notion/Spaces and exchanges de margaux18, postée le 12-02-2017 à 19:14:12 (S | E)
Bonsoir, merci énormément! Voici mon texte corrigé :

The notion I’m going to deal is Spaces and Exchanges. To begin with, I’d like to give a definition of the notion: an exchange is an act of giving and receiving something else in return. It can also be seen as a continuous movement or circulation. There are different kinds of exchanges like media, people, trade... And our world is built on the exploration and conquest of new spaces. To illustrate the notion, I have chosen to talk about immigration in the USA. Mexican immigration is still today a big issue in the United States, it has been the case for many years with President Busch, Clinton or Obama for instance. So we can wonder to what extent does the Mexican immigration impact the US and the American way of life. Firstly, we are going to talk about the measures which have been taken by America to try to protect the border and to stop illegal immigrants from coming and secondly we are going to show that changing have been happening in the American society due to the rising level of Hispanics.

To begin with, the border between Mexico and the USA is the most crossed over in the world. The American government wants to make the border more secure and uneasy to cross. There are around 312 millions of attempts to cross the border every year and it develops drug deals and cartels. We learnt in class in a listening comprehension that US border agents had even discovered illegal constructions like tunnels. Some agents have been aggressed or killed in the line of duty. So the US government has decided to build a fence to prevent immigrants from entering the USA illegally.
Mexican people leave Mexico to have a higher standard of living with med facilities and to have a better future and an education for their children. Furthermore, Mexico is struck by unemployment. The USA appears as a land of opportunities. They want to get papers and then to go back to Mexico and retire. They cross the Rio Grande thanks to smugglers, they are piled in miserable trucks and they can’t move. Thus, they are worried and ill-treated.
Obama willing to increase the controls but to make it easier for those already in America to get papers. He managed to stabilize the relations with Mexico and he talked with Mexico’s President trying to find compromises and mutual agreements, he managed to provide a mechanism so that families are not separates who have been here for a long time. Thanks to him, the Congress passed a law that allowed 2,7 million illegal people to obtain a green card.
But we saw in an article from The Star written by Marina Jimenez that with Trump, there is an evolution of the relationship between Mexico and the US because he wants to build a wall and he wants Mexico to pay for it. Yet the president of Mexico replied on twitter he would never pay for that “racist monument”. So, there are some increasing hot tensions and Mexicans are still-shocked that the US is now a mercantilist predator. Mexico will become less stable which led to American national insecurity because there will be more and more refugees.
Secondly, the increase of Mexican immigrants in the US made grown changes. Indeed, we can notice the emergence of a new culture, the Spanglish. We learnt in class how to speak Spanglish with a video of Flama. We have to switch between English and Spanish. For instance, we take the English word to dress up in Spanish. It shows the influence of Spanish over the English language. It is also a commercial strategy to target the Latino community in the USA. Indeed, when big American firms want to sell their products to the Spanish-speaking community, they often use Spanglish in their ads.
An other change to note is the emergence of a cheap workforce. When they reach the US, the Mexican immigrants are doomed to do painful and menial jobs low skilled and with low wages like dishwasher, gardener or cleaning lady. Some people think that Mexicans are taking away jobs from American citizens but American workers would not automatically accept to work in such conditions.
Undocumented workers represent 5 percent of the American workforce, so it will impoverish the American economy to get them out. The US needs Latino workers and the wall doesn’t stop them getting through. In addition, in some Southern states like Florida or Arizona, whites are becoming a minority because of the rise of Mexican immigration. This migration enables economic exchanges: while Mexicans are given the opportunity to improve their living conditions, the US economy benefits from their adaptability.


Et la conclusion est à suivre dans le prochain message



Réponse : Notion/Spaces and exchanges de margaux18, postée le 12-02-2017 à 19:14:54 (S | E)
Et voici la conclusion :

To conclude migration illustrates the notion Spaces and Exchanges because it creates flows of people and cultures circulating and linking different places around the world. However, immigration has a disreputable side that should be considered by migrants if they have the choice. To answer to the problematic, we can say that even if the Mexican immigration remains debated, it is indisputably a source of economic and cultural wealth for the US. So it impacts the American way of life in necessary and noxious types. I can add about the notion that today, with the globalization, the world become a small village and internet allows mass exchanges. The borders are moving.



Réponse : Notion/Spaces and exchanges de laure95, postée le 13-02-2017 à 10:41:14 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- it has been (mettre au prétérit)the case for many years with President Busch, Clinton or Obama for instance.
- So we can wonder to what extent does the Mexican immigration impact the US and the American way of life: tu fais une interrogative indirecte donc pas de "does" et conjugue le verbe TO HAVE au présent et mets le devant "imact".
- changing (mettre le nom)have (verbe au singulier) been happening in the American society due to the rising level of Hispanics.

- US border agents had even discovered (mettre au présent perfect)illegal constructions like tunnels.
- med: ?
- so that families are not séparâtes: temps ?
- Mexico will become less stable which led ( pourquoi le préterit?)to American national insecurity
- the wall doesn’t stop (mettre au futur) them getting through.

- To answer to (enlever TO) the problematic,
- I can add about the notion: I can add suffit.
- that today, with the (pas de the) globalization, the world become (mettre au présent progressif)a small village



Réponse : Notion/Spaces and exchanges de margaux18, postée le 13-02-2017 à 12:04:36 (S | E)
Bonjour, merci encore pour vos corrections.

The notion I’m going to deal is Spaces and Exchanges. To begin with, I’d like to give a definition of the notion: an exchange is an act of giving and receiving something else in return. It can also be seen as a continuous movement or circulation. There are different kinds of exchanges like media, people, trade... And our world is built on the exploration and conquest of new spaces. To illustrate the notion, I have chosen to talk about immigration in the USA. Mexican immigration is still today a big issue in the United States, it was the case for many years with President Busch, Clinton or Obama for instance. So we can wonder to what extent the Mexican immigration has impact the US and the American way of life. Firstly, we are going to talk about the measures which have been taken by America to try to protect the border and to stop illegal immigrants from coming and secondly we are going to show that change has been happening in the American society due to the rising level of Hispanics.

To begin with, the border between Mexico and the USA is the most crossed over in the world. The American government wants to make the border more secure and uneasy to cross. There are around 312 millions of attempts to cross the border every year and it develops drug deals and cartels. We learnt in class in a listening comprehension that US border agents have even discovered illegal constructions like tunnels. Some agents have been aggressed or killed in the line of duty. So the US government has decided to build a fence to prevent immigrants from entering the USA illegally.
Mexican people leave Mexico to have a higher standard of living with medicals facilities and to have a better future and an education for their children. Furthermore, Mexico is struck by unemployment. The USA appears as a land of opportunities. They want to get papers and then to go back to Mexico and retire. They cross the Rio Grande thanks to smugglers, they are piled in miserable trucks and they can’t move. Thus, they are worried and ill-treated.
Obama willing to increase the controls but to make it easier for those already in America to get papers. He managed to stabilize the relations with Mexico and he talked with Mexico’s President trying to find compromises and mutual agreements, he managed to provide a mechanism so that families are not separating who have been here for a long time. Thanks to him, the Congress passed a law that allowed 2,7 million illegal people to obtain a green card.
But we saw in an article from The Star written by Marina Jimenez that with Trump, there is an evolution of the relationship between Mexico and the US because he wants to build a wall and he wants Mexico to pay for it. Yet the president of Mexico replied on twitter he would never pay for that “racist monument”. So, there are some increasing hot tensions and Mexicans are still-shocked that the US is now a mercantilist predator. Mexico will become less stable which is leading to American national insecurity because there will be more and more refugees.
Secondly, the increase of Mexican immigrants in the US made grown changes. Indeed, we can notice the emergence of a new culture, the Spanglish. We learnt in class how to speak Spanglish with a video of Flama. We have to switch between English and Spanish. For instance, we take the English word to dress up in Spanish. It shows the influence of Spanish over the English language. It is also a commercial strategy to target the Latino community in the USA. Indeed, when big American firms want to sell their products to the Spanish-speaking community, they often use Spanglish in their ads.
An other change to note is the emergence of a cheap workforce. When they reach the US, the Mexican immigrants are doomed to do painful and menial jobs low skilled and with low wages like dishwasher, gardener or cleaning lady. Some people think that Mexicans are taking away jobs from American citizens but American workers would not automatically accept to work in such conditions.
Undocumented workers represent 5 percent of the American workforce, so it will impoverish the American economy to get them out. The US needs Latino workers and the wall will not stop them getting through. In addition, in some Southern states like Florida or Arizona, whites are becoming a minority because of the rise of Mexican immigration. This migration enables economic exchanges: while Mexicans are given the opportunity to improve their living conditions, the US economy benefits from their adaptability.


Puis la conclusion à suivre encore une fois



Réponse : Notion/Spaces and exchanges de margaux18, postée le 13-02-2017 à 12:05:09 (S | E)
Suite de mon texte corrigé :

To conclude migration illustrates the notion Spaces and Exchanges because it creates flows of people and cultures circulating and linking different places around the world. However, immigration has a disreputable side that should be considered by migrants if they have the choice. To answer the problematic, we can say that even if the Mexican immigration remains debated, it is indisputably a source of economic and cultural wealth for the US. So it impacts the American way of life in necessary and noxious types. I can add that today, with globalization, the world is becoming a small village and internet allows mass exchanges. The borders are moving.






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