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Raconter/ stage

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Raconter/ stage
Message de remy73 posté le 27-05-2017 à 10:13:59 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je dois préparer un rapport de stage à l'oral pour mon bac de Terminale en commerce, et je voudrais savoir si j'ai fait des fautes grammaticales/orthographiques de grammaire ou d'orthographe.
Merci à ceux qui auront le temps de m'aider .

My name is Remy, I am in BTEC National Diploma in a vocational school Commerce (Terminale bac pro commerce) and today i will speak to you about my internship .
Devred est un magasin de prêt à porter pour homme. Founded by henri devred in 1902. In France, there are 328 shop. She is situated in Aix-les-Bains . It is a small shop of 150m ² of sales area and 60m ² of reserve. The form of trade is associated. There are 1 manager and 2 seller.
Now I go you explained my days.
In the morning, At ten o'clock,I arrived in this shop, I tidied up the store, I folded clothes, I made of the restocking et I took care of customers.
At noon, I took my lunch break.
At 2 pm, I tidied up the delivered products which we received at 1 pm.
Then I took care of customers and I folded clothes …
At 6 pm, I sweep up, And the vacuum cleaner in the dressing room.
And at 7 pm, my day was finished.
During this internship, I was able to participated in three events.
First events was a VIP evening, Where the store organized promotion for the most loyal customers, With an apéritif and music, From 7 pm till 9 pm
I also set up the sale, i Installed the new posters and the labels special offer.
And to finish, I created my own animation which was a lottery to gain a 100€ purchase voucher. I called it the night-of the sales. When one customers entered I he suggested joining the bingo. I took care of communication, to create posters and registration forms ..
The animation took place on June 24th from 5 pm till 9 pm. I took a lot of pleasure to make this animation.
During this internship(training course) I have again taught a lot..

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 27-05-2017 10:18


Réponse : Raconter/ stage de dsmith, postée le 29-05-2017 à 06:19:44 (S | E)
Hello Remy,
J'ai mis quelques suggestions:

My name is Remy, I am in BTEC National Diploma in a vocational school Commerce (Terminale bac pro commerce) and today i will speak to you about my internship .
Devred est un magasin de prêt à porter pour homme (il faut l'écrire en anglais). Founded by henri devred in 1902. In France, there are 328 shop (pluriel pas singulier). She (ce n'est pas une personne - alors "it") is situated in Aix-les-Bains . It is a small shop of 150m ² of sales area and 60m ² of reserve. The form of trade is associated (je ne comprends pas). There are (a coté de 1 manager tu dois dire "There is" 1 manager and 2 seller (pluriel car il y en a deux) (il y a un meilleur mot que seller).
Now I go you explained my days. (hmmm....I am going to... or I will)
In the morning, At ten o'clock,I arrived in this shop, I tidied up the store, I folded clothes, I made of (faire = make or do - en ce cas "I did the restocking") the restocking et (traduire) I took care of customers.
At noon, I took my lunch break.
At 2 pm, I tidied up the delivered products which we received at 1 pm.
Then I took care of customers and I folded clothes …
At 6 pm, I sweep (passé) up, And the vacuum cleaner (il faut un verbe ici) in the dressing room.
And at 7 pm, my day was finished.
During this internship, I was able to participated (pas de d en ce cas) in three events.
First events (singulier) was a VIP evening, Where the store organized promotion for the most loyal customers, With an apéritif and music, From 7 pm till 9 pm
I also set up the sale, i Installed the new posters and the labels special offer (ordre - adjectif avant nom - en ce cas "special offer" est l'adjectif et "labels" est le nom".
And to finish, I created my own animation (animation n'est pas la meme chose en anglais...mieux "activity" which was a lottery to gain a 100€ purchase voucher. I called it the night-of the sales. When one customers entered I he suggested joining (essaye I suggested that...pas ing avec joining) the bingo. I took care of communication, to create posters and registration forms ..
The animation took place on June 24th from 5 pm till 9 pm. I took a lot of pleasure to make - (mieux create) this animation.
During this internship(training course) I have again taught a lot..



Réponse : Raconter/ stage de remy73, postée le 07-06-2017 à 10:59:58 (S | E)
Merci d'avoir pris du temps pour moi, mes corrections.

My name is Remy, I am in BTEC National Diploma in a vocational school Commerce (Terminale bac pro commerce) and today i will speak to you about my internship .
Devred 
is
a ready to work shop for men.  
Founded by henri devred in 1902. In France, there are 328 shops. It is situated in Aix-les-Bains . It is a small shop of 150m ² of sales area and 60m ² of reserve. The form of trade is associated (La forme de commerce est associé). There is 1 manager and 2 shopkeeper.


Now I am going to explain my days. 
In the morning, At ten o'clock,I arrived in this shop, I tidied up the store, I folded clothes, I did the restocking and I took care of customers.
At noon, I took my lunch break.
At 2 pm, I tidied up the delivered products which we received at 1 pm.
Then I took care of customers and I folded clothes …
At 6 pm, I swept  up, And the vacuum cleaner (lesquel?) in the dressing room.
And at 7 pm, my day was finished.
During this internship, I was able to participate  in three events.
First event  was a VIP evening, Where the store organized promotion for the most loyal customers, With an apéritif and music, From 7 pm till 9 pm
I also set up the sale, i Installed the new posters and the 
special offer labels.


And to finish, I created my own activity  which was a lottery to gain a 100€ purchase voucher. I called it the night-of the sales. When one customer entered I suggested that to joined the bingo. I took care of communication, to create posters and registration forms ..
The 
activity took place on June 24th from 5 pm till 9 pm. I took a lot of pleasure to create this activity.
During this internship(training course) I have again taught a lot..

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 07-06-2017 11:04




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