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Rentrée (correction)
Message de nounours_love posté le 29-10-2008 à 17:18:12 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
En anglais je dois faire une rédaction sur mon premier jour au lycée.
Est ce que quelqu'un peut me corriger les fautes SVP ?
Voici ma rédaction :
My first day in the high school was like this :
First I took bus and I met Helenen.Her and me were very stressed but we were happy to be together.
When we arrived in front of the school, we waited a few minutes then we entered in the hall:
There are a lot of pupils and we could not see the list where it was written the class where we were so we went to the playground and a few minutes later we saw Marion.
She told at us we were all in the same class.
We came back in our house with many friends by bus.She's wearing a blue tee-shirt ,jeans and a brown jacket.She's carring a canvas bag.
Later we met the pupils with who we will be this year and our principal profesor.
Then we visited the high school and we went ta take our books and our profesor give at us the papers we had to complete and to give back.
Next,the bell rang and we went to the canteen.
More later we returned in the class and then we came out high school.
Merci
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Modifié par bridg le 29-10-2008 17:46
Titre distinctif
Message de nounours_love posté le 29-10-2008 à 17:18:12 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
En anglais je dois faire une rédaction sur mon premier jour au lycée.
Est ce que quelqu'un peut me corriger les fautes SVP ?
Voici ma rédaction :
My first day in the high school was like this :
First I took bus and I met Helenen.Her and me were very stressed but we were happy to be together.
When we arrived in front of the school, we waited a few minutes then we entered in the hall:
There are a lot of pupils and we could not see the list where it was written the class where we were so we went to the playground and a few minutes later we saw Marion.
She told at us we were all in the same class.
We came back in our house with many friends by bus.She's wearing a blue tee-shirt ,jeans and a brown jacket.She's carring a canvas bag.
Later we met the pupils with who we will be this year and our principal profesor.
Then we visited the high school and we went ta take our books and our profesor give at us the papers we had to complete and to give back.
Next,the bell rang and we went to the canteen.
More later we returned in the class and then we came out high school.
Merci
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 29-10-2008 17:46
Titre distinctif
Réponse: Rentrée (correction) de hoger, postée le 29-10-2008 à 20:45:24 (S | E)
My first day in the high school was like this:
First I took bus and I met Helenen (??). Her and me were ( mieux : we wer both ) very stressed but we were happy to be together.
When we arrived in front of the school, we waited a few minutes then we entered
There are ( temps du verbe !) a lot of pupils and we could not see the list where
She told at us we were all in the same class.
We came back
Later we met the pupils with who we
Then we visited the high school and we went ta take our books and our profesor give ( temps du verbe !)
Next ( je propose "finally" ), the bell rang and we went to the canteen.
More later (= "plus plus tard" ) we returned
INDISPENSABLES : 