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Essay/ You are what you eat

<< Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Essay/ You are what you eat
Message de soniapadme posté le 22-11-2009 à 22:20:09 (S | E | F)

Bonsoir à tous, j'ai un essai à rendre et je voudrais savoir si quelqu'un peut me corriger les erreurs que j'ai faites et s'il faut que je modifie des choses. Merci d'avance

Enoncé: Is your fridge stocked of fresh fruits, vegetables and lean meats or is it full-filled, overly salted process convenience foods and abandoned take out containers ? We've all heard the old adage 'You are what you eat'!Do you agree with it? Do you think healthy eating is the key to wellbeing? If we truly are what we eat, what do your eating habits say about you ?


Obesity is a leading preventable cause of death and authorities view it as one of the most serious public health of 21st century. We can wonder what type of food allow us to be healthy? First of all, we need to explain more precisely the meaning of the old adage 'you are what you eat'. Then, we're going to show that healthy eating is the key to wellbeing.

My fridge is stocked full of fresh fruits, vegetables and lean meats. To my mind, the healthier your diet, the healthier your body. I mean, I prefer to have a well-balanced meal because it's an important part of a healthy lifestyle.

The idiom 'You are what you eat' or 'Der mensch ist, was er ibt' originated with Ludwig A.Feuerbach, a student of the popular philosopher Hegel. The notion of this old adage explain us the quality of that you eat define who you are. But, it means also what you eat determines how healthy of a person you are. So to be fit and healthy you need to eat good food. It was first used in 1960's (during the hippie era). It originally referred to eating wholefood.

Healthy eating is it the key to wellbeing? Actually, that's true but be aware healthy eating is not about a strict nutrition, staying unreaslistically thin and depriving yourself of the foods you love. It's rather about feeling great, having more energy, keeping yourself as healthy as possible. In addition, it's also to choose the types of foods that improve your health and to avoid foods raise your risk for such illness as heart disease, cancer and diabetes.

To conclude, i consider myself as healthy eater because i love eating fruits and vegetables too much. But in my opinion, if we want to be healthy it's an absolutely necessity to do sport like yoga, jogging ... in order to feel good about oneself.


-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 23-11-2009 06:42
titre


Réponse: Essay/ You are what you eat de robertbrou, postée le 23-11-2009 à 19:05:43 (S | E)
Bonjour,

Voici mes suggestions:

Enoncé: Is your fridge stocked of (mauvaise préposition) fresh fruits, vegetables and lean meats or is it full-filled (se confond avec fulfill=réaliser), overly salted process (participe passé) convenience foods and abandoned take out containers ? We've all heard the old adage 'You are what you eat'!Do you agree with it? Do you think healthy eating is the key to wellbeing? If we truly are what we eat, what do your eating habits say about you ? (soit we;we;our;us, soit you;you;your;you)


Obesity is a leading preventable cause of death and authorities view it as one of the most serious public health (nom manquant) of the 21st century. We can wonder what type of food allow (accord sujet verbe) us to be healthy? First of all, we need to explain more precisely the meaning of the old (1 fois avec 'old' suffit) adage 'you are what you eat'. Then, we're going to show that healthy eating is the key to wellbeing.

My fridge is stocked full of fresh fruits, vegetables and lean meats. To ('to' ne marche pas ici) my mind, the healthier your diet (facultatif-verbe manquant), the healthier your body (verbe manquant). I mean, I prefer to have a well-balanced meal because it's an important part of a healthy lifestyle.

The idiom 'You are what you eat' or 'Der mensch ist, was er ibt' (verbe manquant) originated with Ludwig A.Feuerbach, a student of the popular philosopher Hegel. The notion of this old adage explain (accord sujet-verbe) to us the quality of that you eat define (accord sujet-verbe) who you are. But, it means also (manque pronom relatif) what you eat determines how healthy of a person you are. So to be fit and healthy you need to eat good food. It was first used in 1960's (during the hippie era). It originally referred to eating wholefood.

Healthy eating is (placement) it the key to wellbeing? Actually, that's true but be aware (manque pronom relatif) healthy eating is not about a strict nutrition, staying unrealistically thin and depriving yourself of the foods you love. It's rather about feeling great, having more energy, (manquant conjonction) keeping yourself as healthy as possible. In addition, it's also to about choose (gérondif) the types of foods that improve your health and to avoid (gérondif) foods raise your risk for such illness as heart disease, cancer and diabetes.

To conclude, i (toujours MAJUSCULE) consider myself as healthy eater because i love eating fruits and vegetables too much (trop?). But in my opinion, if we want to be healthy it's an absolutely (forme adjective) necessity to do sport like yoga, jogging ... in order to feel good about oneself (doit s'accorder à 'we' du début de la phrase).

Hope this helps!

-------------------
Modifié par robertbrou le 23-11-2009 19:10



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