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Correction/Mangas

<< Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction/Mangas
Message de liselou posté le 05-04-2010 à 11:35:11 (S | E | F)

Bonjour à tous

Tout d'abord, avant de vous balancer présenter comme ça mon devoir, je pense qu'il serait mieux que je précise certains points :
- Je suis de niveau Fac (ce qui correspond au niveau intermédiaire sur le site).
- il s'agit d'un exposé plutôt court (10 min max) sur un film : certain me diront "mais pourquoi tu n'as pas pris directement des textes en anglais?!" Et bien pour moi, ça voudrait dire "solution de facilité", absence de travail, etc. Et puis, on retient tellement mieux quand c'est nous qui avons fait nos phrases...

Si je fais appel à vous, c'est parce que j'ai pas mal de problèmes de temps (et de grammaire) quand j'écris. J'ai travaillé avec le dictionnaire "DHOxford"(pas google !!)
Je vais vous mettre mon exposé, et ceux qui veulent m'aider, me corriger, sont évidemment les bienvenues.
Merci d'avance.

Voici la première partie de l'exposé:
Intro

First mangas were short stories published in japanese news papers, drawing one's inspiration from occidental carricatures. In the sixties, mangas were quickly developped to the small screen: they are called "animes". "Manga" is the paper story, and "anime" is the adaptation of the manga to the small screen. The third category is "japanese animation", movies for the cinema.
In 2006, France was the second consumer of mangas and japanese animations. But in Europe, people think that both are reserved for children, that's why japanese animation suffered during a long time from cliches.
I would like to talk you about the japanese animation "Chihiro's travel", directed by Hayao Miyazaki in 2001. Why ? Because this animation is the most well-known of this director. Moreover, thanks to this movie, he left his mark on the reputation and the quality of these animations.

The Story

"Chihiro's travel" is the story about Chihiro, a young girl of ten-years-old, whose her parents are transformed into pigs. She's faced with a dangerous world of gods, spirits and monsters where useless humains are trasnformed into animals or disappear. Chihiro meets a young boy, Haku, who decides to help her to survive. To do that, she must give up her name and work to Yubâba's thermal baths. Yubâba is the witch who transformed Chihiro's parents. Spirits and gods come to her baths to rest.
A mysterious masqued spririt enter the baths an throws gold nuggets to employees : in fact, this spirit is No-Face, a monster which eats what ever he sees, particularly humains. The unique people he seemes listening is Chihiro. During this time, Haku find, unfortunately, a magic seal that Zenniba, the twin of Yubâba, wants to recover at all costs.
So, to save Haku, Chihiro decides to meet Zenniba in order to give back her seal, and takes No-Face with her. At this moment of the movie, Zenniba reveal to the girl that the enchantement on her parents is break off, thanks to her love for Haku. No-Face decides to live with Zenniba.
Back thermal baths, chihiro has to get over an ultimate ordeal : identify her parents among twelve pigs. Sh explains to Yubâba that they are not here. Consequently, th witch has to keep her promise : deliver Chihiro, her parents, and Haku.


Voilà. Fin de la première partie. Ensuite, il y a la biographie de Miyazaki, puis une petite conclusion. Je les posterai plus tard...

-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 05-04-2010 11:40
+ titre


Réponse: Correction/Mangas de prescott, postée le 05-04-2010 à 12:28:35 (S | E)
Hello,

Nice try indeed. Keep it up!

First mangas were short stories published in japanese news papers, drawing one's inspiration from occidental carricatures. In the sixties, mangas were quickly developped to the small screen: they are called "animes". "Manga" is the paper story, and "anime" ["animé" is here a Japanese word, so "é" is needed or "animay" for English readers] is the adaptation of the manga to the small screen. The third category is "japanese animation", movies for the cinema.
In 2006, France was the second consumer of mangas and japanese animations. But in Europe, [most] people think that both are reserved for children, that's why ["langage parlé": refaire la phrase avec "Because" bien placé] Japanese animation suffered during a long time from cliches.
I would like to talk you about the Japanese animation "Chihiro's travel"[Spirited Away = 千と千尋の神隠し], directed by Hayao Miyazaki in 2001. Why ? Because this animation is the most well-known [out of Japan] of this director. Moreover, thanks to this movie, he left his mark on the reputation and the quality of these animations.

The Story

"Chihiro's travel"[Spirited Away] is the story about Chihiro, a young girl of ten-years-old, whose her parents are transformed into pigs. She's faced with a [fascinating and] dangerous world of gods, spirits and monsters where useless humains are trasnformed into animals or disappear. Chihiro meets a young boy, Haku, who decides to help her to survive. To do that, she must give up her name and work to Yubâba's thermal baths. Yubâba is the witch who transformed Chihiro's parents. Spirits and gods come to her baths to rest.
A mysterious masqued spririt enter the baths an throws gold nuggets to employees : in fact, this spirit is No-Face [cockroach], a monster which eats what ever he sees, particularly humains. The unique people he seemes listening is Chihiro. During this time, Haku find, unfortunately, a magic seal that Zenniba, the twin of Yubâba, wants to recover at all costs.
So, to save Haku, Chihiro decides to meet Zenniba in order to give back her seal, and takes No-Face with her. At this moment of the movie, Zenniba reveal to the girl that the enchantement on her parents is break off, thanks to her love for Haku. No-Face decides to live with Zenniba.
Back [to the] thermal baths, Chihiro has to get over an ultimate ordeal : identify her parents among twelve pigs. She explains to Yubâba that they are not here. Consequently, the witch has to keep her promise : deliver Chihiro, her parents, and Haku.

-------------------
Modifié par prescott le 06-04-2010 10:07


Réponse: Correction/Mangas de liselou, postée le 05-04-2010 à 13:49:42 (S | E)
Hello prescott

Thank you very much for your answer.
But I don't understand some corrections (highligted words): What's the problem with
- "she must give up her name and work to Yubâba's thermal baths"
- "a monster which eats what ever he sees"
- "She explains to Yubâba that they are not here. "

Thank you for your patience




Réponse: Correction/Mangas de prescott, postée le 05-04-2010 à 15:10:01 (S | E)
Hello again,

Comment about the original title : "Sen to Chihiro no Kamigakushi" = Sen and Chihiro's Spiriting Away. [Un des deux caractères formant le nom composé de "Chi" + "hiro", se lit "Sen" en lecture seule., Réduit à "Sen", elle est condamnée à devenir un spectre.]
"Le voyage de Chihiro" est un choix très appauvri, car le mot clé de l'histoire, c'est qu'on lui "vole son âme" en lui volant son nom, et c'est un peu ce que fait le titre français! Aie...

Chihiro must sign a contract to work for Yubaba in the bathhouse, who then steals her name and changes it for the new name of "Sen".

She declares (to Yubaba) that NONE of the pigs are her parents,

Zenibaba reveals to the girl that the enchantment on her parents is broken, thanks to her love for Haku. No-Face decides to live with Zenibaba.

English transcriptions that might help:

Yubaba (pas de macron sur le â)
Zenibaba (un seul "n" et le suffixe baba, qui signifie "mémé")

English vocabulary you may need:
whatever, newspaper (en un seul mot)
bathhouse (instead of bath therms)
I would like to tell you about(not talk)

See this link for your inspiration (not perfect though )
Lien Internet


-------------------
Modifié par prescott le 05-04-2010 15:29



Réponse: Correction/Mangas de liselou, postée le 05-04-2010 à 16:57:00 (S | E)
oh... ...I'm very stupid !! Thank you for these corrections.
(and thanks for the link)

Maintenant, pour ceux qui ont le courage de lire mes 2 dernières parties...les voici! J'ai eu beaucoup de mal à les écrire. J'espère que mes fautes ne vous choqueront pas tant que ça.

Biography of the director: Hayao Miyazaki

Hayao Miyazaki was born on January 5th of 1941, in Tokyo. During the Second War, his father (Katsuji Miyazaki) managed the family enterprise "Miyazaki Airplane". Fascinated by planes, Hayao developed a voracious passion for flying devices.
1956 to 1958, he developed an interest for animation. He was particularly fascinated by the first length colour film in Japan : "Hakuja Den", directed by Taiji Yabushita in 1958. At that time, Miyazaki decided to become artist, and began to draw (mainly planes and military boats).
In 1979, he realised his first length film "The Castle of Cagliostro", based on Lupin III, a character created by Monkey Punch. In 1982, Miyazaki was unemployed. He began to work on "Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind", epic manga which writing was spread over twelve years. This manga had a certain success, and an animated adaptation was seek.
In 1985, Ghibli Studio was created with the intention of produce "Laputa: Castle in the sky". In 1988, Miyazaki directed "My Neighbour Totoro" : this character, Totoro, became the emblem of Ghibli Studio. And in 1997, he produced "Princess Mononoke", the most important success film in Japan at this moment. Today, Miyazaki continues to produce news short films intended to Ghibli Museum.

Conclusion

"Sen and Chihiro's Spiriting Away" is a fascinating film which transports the spectator to a magical world. Despite many critics of Miyazaki about our consumer society, this animation is an ode to dream childhood.
For the Japan Academy Awards, it's recognized like the better film of the year (2001). It's a success with foreign countries too. For example, France counts nearly 1,5 millions of spectators only for this film. It wins the Golden Bear at the Berlin International Film Festival in 2002, and the Oscar for the better animation in 2003.
With this film, Miyazaki got world renown and an artistic gratitude. He had done letters patent of nobility to mangas and Japanese animations. Finally, that reputation widely promotes Japanese values like painting, literature, music, religion and traditions.





Réponse: Correction/Mangas de prescott, postée le 05-04-2010 à 17:32:27 (S | E)
Good stuff!

A few suggestions:

"Anime film director" or "Anime filmmaker"

"Studio Ghibli" is a company name, and should not be reversed. But "Ghibli Museum" is fine as is.

Do you mean "the most successful film" ?

Time to go to bed here, or I'll be spirited away!
oyasumi...
Good luck!


Réponse: Correction/Mangas de liselou, postée le 05-04-2010 à 18:02:56 (S | E)
thank you very much !

I took your suggestions.
(and "the most successful film" is most right)

Arigatoo gozaimasu!
Oyasumi nasaï !


Réponse: Correction/Mangas de prescott, postée le 05-04-2010 à 23:31:03 (S | E)
Ohayou gozaimasu!


"to become an artist"

his first "feature-length film" (/cartoon) = son premier "long métrage"

"news short film" OR "new short films" makes a big difference in meaning.

"an epic manga"

Si le manga a été publié en fascicules (feuilleton) "spread over twelve months" est correct, mais si on veut simplement parler de 12 ans de gestation avant la publication, alors "... the writing of which took up twelve years (of his life)."

Une "enfance de rêve" est généralement bien rendu par "ideal childhood".
cf. "ideal childhood", generally imagined as a wholly separate estate from adulthood, a pitifully brief era of bliss and innocence [...].





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