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Correction/ essai

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction/ essai
Message de lisouille03 posté le 07-10-2016 à 18:18:13 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
en anglais je dois faire un essai sur : Why should students take a gap year?
Est-ce que quelqu'un pourrait m'aider à corriger s'il vous plaît ?
Merci pour vos réponses.

Some students then choose to go to the foreigners during a period to external studies. This choice has many benefits.
In the first place, the usual aim of improving his language skills, progress and see his grades up. Indeed, starting some time abroad, the student is obliged to speak the language of the country where he resides, to respect the verbal times to be understood.

Also, a student may choose to experience this gap year to come out more mature. The magazine Le Figaro, described the experience as rewarding and so "the candidate matures." This break with the home country allows become more mature by learning to manage his financial budget, to have her own apartment without having to ask for help to parents. Therefore, it is an experience that allows you to discover yourself to be more autonomous and to have an open mind to the new culture that is offered to the candidate.

Moreover, when making a gap year, we discover the world around us. We often used to our city, our country and its traditions. But if we start to foreigners, we quickly realize that our French traditions are not the same in other countries. That's when the "culture shock" and we can see other customs such as tomato fight that takes place in Spain, in the town of Buñol, and where the Spanish indulge in a tomato fight in the streets on the last Wednesday of August.

In conclusion, some choississent students to do a gap year to improve their language level and thus progress academically. In addition, this experience allows to become more mature by being more independent and more responsible but also helps to have an open mind to what surrounds us. Therefore, make a gap year is a solution to enhance its culture, develop his life, learn new languages.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 07-10-2016 22:30


Réponse : Correction/ essai de here4u, postée le 08-10-2016 à 10:01:57 (S | E)
Hello!
Erreurs en bleu.

Some students then? choose to go to the foreigners(il ne s'agit pas des habitants, mais du pays ...) during a period to external studies. This choice has many benefits.
In the first place, the usual aim of improving his language skills, progress and see his grades up.(this isn't a sentence!) Indeed, starting some time abroad, the student is obliged to speak the language of the country where he resides, to respect the verbal times to be understood.

Also, a student may choose to experience this gap year to come out more mature(très mal dit!). The magazine Le Figaro, described the experience as rewarding and so "the candidate matures." This break with the home country allows XX become more mature by learning to manage his/or her! financial budget, to have her own apartment without having to ask for help to parents. Therefore, it is an experience that allows you to discover yourself to be more autonomous and to have an open mind to the new culture that is offered to the candidate.(établir une cohérence de pronoms... en généralisant!)

Moreover, when (m Taking a gap year, we discover the world around us. We XXX often used(confusion used to/ to be used to) to our city, our country and its traditions. But if we start to foreigners, we quickly realize that our French traditions are not the same in other countries. That's when the "culture shock" and we can see other customs such as tomato fight that takes place in Spain, in the town of Buñol, and where the Spanish indulge in a tomato fight in the streets on the last Wednesday of August.

In conclusion, some choississent students to do a gap year to improve their language level and thus progress academically. In addition, this experience allows to become more mature by being more independent and more responsible but also helps to have an open mind to what surrounds us. Therefore, make a gap year is a solution to enhance its culture, develop his life, learn new languages.




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