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Description/ graphique

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Description/ graphique
Message de ckenymis posté le 17-03-2017 à 11:02:29 (S | E | F)
Hello everyone !
Je dois décrire un graphique en anglais, pouvez-vous m'indiquer où se situent mes erreurs éventuelles ?
Je vous transmets ici le lien du graphique, si vous en avez besoin :
Lien internet

Merci beaucoup

Ma description :
This line graph below illustrates the beef consumption in the United States from 1960 to 2013.
First of all, we can notice that beef consumption minimally growed between 1960 to 1962, before falling till 1963.
Then, we note a moderate climb from 1963 to 1965, where the average of beef tons stood about 7 million tons.
This figure increased steadily for the next 13 years reaching 10 million tons in 1970 and 12 million in 1972.
The number of beef tons then fluctuated a little, in the extent that they went down to 9 million in 1973.
Suddenly, we can notice a considerable boom in beef consumption since the curve reached a maximal peak at about 14 million tons of consumption in 1975.
As a result, the beef consumption rate almost doubled over a ten-years period.

However, the line graph tells us about a dramatic drop from 1977 to 1979 since we can observe a decline of nearly 80% in beef consumption in 1979 compared to 1977 before noticing a gradual growth till 1985, then a drop again (or a relapse ?) till 1995.
That way, we see that the rates in 1985 are almost the same, despite some fluctuations between these two dates.
Finally, we can note that the figure if beef consumption more or less rose till 2005 before a relapse in 2010 to end by stabling till 2013.

To put it in a nutshell, as the graph shows us, beef consumption in the United States has globally tended to increased but decreased during the last 50 years in spite of a succession of rise and fall periods the last few years.
These different rates can be due to the meat price which keeps growing, the discover of diseases like cancer from ref meat consumption, but especially thanks to several organisations, such as Green Peace, which make people aware of animal suffering.
It could be interesting to compare these datas in the United States to the one in France, or even to a document showing us the evolution of vegetarian rate in the United States the last years.
In the future we can think that the number of people who don't eat meat anymore tends to drop because of some associations such as L214 in France : as far as I know, nowadays, in 2017, the rate of meat consumption is the lowest of these 10 last years.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 17-03-2017 12:32



Réponse : Description/ graphique de gerondif, postée le 18-03-2017 à 17:39:21 (S | E)
Bonjour,
erreurs en bleu, corrections en vert

This line graph below illustrates (the) beef consumption in the United States from 1960 to 2013.
First of all, we can notice that beef consumption minimally(choix et place de l'adverbe) growed(verbe irrégulier) between 1960 to 1962, before falling till(bizarre de mettre un jusqu'à,(plutôt until d'ailleurs) il y a peu de distance entre 62 et 63 !) 1963.
Then, we note a moderate climb from 1963 to 1965, where(when) the average of beef tons (ça ne se dit pas, la moyenne des tonnes de boeuf, on parlerait de moyenne de consommation ou de consommation moyenne) stood about 7 million tons.
This figure increased steadily for the next 13 years (virgule) reaching 10 million tons in 1970 and 12 million in 1972.
The number of beef tons (maladroit) then fluctuated a little, in the extent that they(qui est ce they ? number était singulier) went down to 9 million in 1973.
Suddenly, we can notice a considerable boom in beef consumption since the curve reached a maximal peak at about 14 million tons of consumption (on dit une consommatin de tant de tonnes, pas x tonnes de consommation) in 1975.
As a result, the beef consumption rate almost doubled over a ten-year(adjectival, donc invariable) period.

However, the line graph tells us about (il est rare qu'une courbe parle ou raconte une histoire, elle montre, illustre ou indique))a dramatic drop from 1977 to 1979 since we can observe a decline of nearly 80% in beef consumption in 1979 compared to 1977 before noticing a gradual growth till 1985, then a drop again (or a relapse ?) till 1995.
That way, we see that the rates in 1985 are almost the same, despite some fluctuations between these two dates.
Finally, we can note that the figure if beef consumption more or less(se met derrière le verbe) rose till(plutôt until) 2005 before a relapse in 2010 to end by stabling till 2013.

To put it in a nutshell, as the graph shows us, beef consumption in the United States has globally tended to increased(infinitif) but decreased during the last 50 years in spite of a succession of rise and fall periods these last few years.
These different rates can be due to the meat price which keeps growing, the discovery of diseases like cancer from ref meat(c'est quoi, ref meat , raw meat, je connais, mais pas ref meat) consumption, but especially thanks to several organisations, such as Green Peace, which make people aware of animal suffering.
It could be interesting to compare these datas in the United States to the ones in France, or even to a document showing us the evolution of vegetarian rate in the United States the last years.
In the future we can think that the number of people who don't eat meat anymore tends(mettez un futur) to drop because of some associations such as L214 in France : as far as I know, nowadays, in 2017, the rate of meat consumption is the lowest of(in) these 10 last(ordre des mots) years.



Réponse : Description/ graphique de gerold, postée le 18-03-2017 à 18:28:36 (S | E)
Bonjour ckenymis,
votre dernière phrase m`étonne un peu, étant donné le contexte:
In the future we can think that the number of people who don't eat meat anymore tends to drop because of some associations such as L214 in France : as far as I know, nowadays, in 2017, the rate of meat consumption is the lowest of these 10 last years.
Le nombre de gens qui ne mangent plus de viande tendra à baisser? ou plutôt à augmenter???




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