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Cover letter/correction

Cours gratuits > Forum > Thèmes généraux, jeux, chansons || En bas

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Cover letter/correction
Message de elviredes posté le 12-09-2012 à 18:26:05 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous,

je copie-colle ici une lettre de motivation en anglais pour un stage d'année de césure.
Si quelqu'un avait la gentillesse de jeter un coup d'oeil pour corriger rapidement les mauvaises tournures / mal dit / fautes diverses...
Merci beaucoup d'avance!!

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to apply to an internship at the ..... I graduated in a double bachelor's degree in X and X at the ....... I am extremely interested in obtaining a position in curating or conservation work to improve my experience and skills and to have the opportunity to work abroad before a master's degree at the university of ..... I will be available from the beginning of January to the end of July. I would be particularly interested in the Curatorial department, the Exhibitions and Collections management and the Education department.

Working at the .... would be a very interesting opportunity for me, since I have developed a special interest in ..... by studying it at the ... with Professor X. My studies have brought me a wide range of knowledge in very different fields such as Art History, Museology, Law and Philosophy. I have also been studying English through courses of written and spoken language, litterature and civilization.

The difficulty of the double cursus learnt me to perform a very rigorous and organized work - I am also a self-sufficient, responsible and hard-working person. My work experience in the art field has been particularly helpful for me, especially these last months while working as an assistant for conservation and in charge of mediation for schools in a contemporary Art Center in the South of France. This internship increased my interest in museum work and learned me the development and issues of an exhibition place. Also, it improved my qualifications in confidently working both alone and in teams. I also worked as a gallery assistant and for different artistic events such as fairs and exhibitions in Paris.

Finally, the opportunity of an internship in ... would be very interesting for me both in a personal and professional point of view and would also help me to improve my English.
I will be available for a Skype interview if necessary. I remain available in case of any questions.

I’m looking forward to talk with you soon.

Yours faithfully,
X

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 12-09-2012 19:06



Réponse: Cover letter/correction de gerondif, postée le 12-09-2012 à 18:41:21 (S | E)
Bonjour,

Vous confondez to learn: apprendre au sens de intégrer un savoir et to teach: enseigner à quelqu'un.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to apply to (to apply for, me semble-t-il) an internship at the ..... I graduated in a double bachelor's degree in X and X at the .......(il me semble qu'on dirait: I passed (au sens de réussir) a double bachelor's degree and graduated in science and history par exemple) I am extremely interested in obtaining a position in curating or conservation work to improve my experience and skills and to have the opportunity to work abroad before (sitting for) a master's degree at the university of ..... I will be available from the beginning of January to the end of July. I would be particularly interested in the Curatorial department, the Exhibitions and Collections management and the Education department.

Working at the .... would be a very interesting opportunity for me, since I have developed a special interest in ..... by studying it at the ... with Professor X. My studies have brought me a wide range of knowledge in very different fields such as Art History, Museology, Law and Philosophy. I have also been studying English through courses of written and spoken language, litterature and civilization.

The difficulty of the double cursus learnt(taught) me to perform a very rigorous and organized work - I am also a self-sufficient, responsible and hard-working person. My work experience in the art field has been particularly helpful for me, especially these last months while working as an assistant for conservation and in charge of mediation for schools in a contemporary Art Center in the South of France. This internship increased my interest in museum work and learned me the development and issues of an exhibition place. Also, it improved my qualifications in confidently working both alone and in teams. I also worked as a gallery assistant and for different artistic events such as fairs and exhibitions in Paris.

Finally, the opportunity of an internship in ... would be very interesting for me both in (from) a personal and professional point of view and would also help me to improve my English.
I will be available (I am irait aussi) for a Skype interview if necessary. I remain available in case of any questions.(sonne trop français à mon avis)

I’m looking forward to (+ ing) talk with you soon. (talk me paraît un peu familier dans ce genre de lettre)

Yours faithfully,



Réponse: Cover letter/correction de elviredes, postée le 12-09-2012 à 20:52:20 (S | E)
merci beaucoup!!




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