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Lettre motivation/ Erasmus

Cours gratuits > Forum > Thèmes généraux, jeux, chansons || En bas

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Lettre motivation/ Erasmus
Message de valentilu posté le 27-03-2014 à 22:31:08 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Je suis étudiante et je dois écrire une lettre de motivation pour candidate au programme Erasmus. Malheureusement je n'ai aucun professeur, ni aucune connaissance pour me corriger.
Je sais que la lettre est longue, mais si vous pouvez me corriger même sur une petite partie, ça m'aidera beaucoup.
Merci pour votre aide.

Dear Madam or Sir,

With this letter, I would like to express my interest in studying at the Technical University of XX as an exchange student.

I am currently studying Bachelor's Degree programme in Civil Engineering at the XY University. Having looked through the materials of the Foreign Department of my university, I was very delighted to find the opportunity to spend two semester learning civil engineering in a foreign university. I have decided to apply for this programme because I am sure it would strongly enrich my future studies and help me in my prospective career. It is also a great opportunity to improve my English and increase my confidence in passing the TOEFL examinations, which is often asked to be accepted in Master's Degree. Moreover I consider this programme as a great opportunity to get in touch with Swedish way of life and educational system. I am very curious about different approaches to the civil engineering , there must be many differences between a mountainous country like Switzerland, and Sweden, a country mainly made up with coastal towns.
More precisely, I choose XX because it is the ideal place for me. On the one hand, we can easy enjoy the nature, because it's an human-scale and nature-orientated city, but on the other hand, it's a young and dynamic city, with an airport and good connection with neighbouring cities.
Then, I don't want to go in Erasmus just to have fun and enjoy a new culture, but also keep a very good educational level. That's why I studied a lot of ranking before making a choice about the university, and I saw that Chalmers had very good rank. Furthermore, I really like the module system of study at Chalmers. I specially appreciate the wide range of offered modules and the freedom in making your study plan. Many of the modules offered are unique for me, because there is no equivalent at my home university.

Last but not least, I know the reputation of Scandinavian countries, and especially of Sweden for its innovative ideas in urbanism and planning, but also in the field of construction. That's why I choose to apply at XX University. I was totally convinced when I saw that almost all the courses were related to sustainable development. In this area, XX stay definitely one step ahead of XY(my university), and this is a important point for me because I'm very interested by this subject, I have found out I would like to specialise in sustainable construction and planning during my prior studies. Since I am at XY, I took two optional courses related to this topic (one about various environmental policies the first year, and one exactly about sustainable development this year) and I am an active member of ABC, the association for sustainable development at XY. I am also motivated by the fact that there is an equivalent association at XX. The University of XX gives me a chance to get in touch with these subjects through modules from both Department of Civil engineering and Department of Town and Regional Planning. I would like to use my stay in XX for further developing my skills in sustainable construction and urban planning, because the possibilities that gives me your University further expand those at my home university.

Finally, I notice that this choice was ideal for me, valuable for both my studies and overall general development, because of the friendly and young atmosphere of the city, the “Excellent” rating for teaching of the Civil engineering department and the inspiring, creative, and cosmopolite environment of one of the largest Swedish universities.


Thank you for considering my request. I look forward to your positive response.

Yours faithfully,
GG

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 27-03-2014 22:44


Réponse: Lettre motivation/ Erasmus de bluestar, postée le 28-03-2014 à 17:05:07 (S | E)
Bonjour..

Très bon niveau d'anglais. J'ai fait quelques suggestions ci-dessous. Bonne chance avec votre application.
----------------------------------------------------------------

With this letter, I would like wish to express my interest in studying at the Technical University of XX as an exchange student.

I am currently studying in the Bachelor's Degree programme in Civil Engineering at the XY University. Having looked through the materials of the Foreign Department of my university, I was very delighted to find the opportunity to spend two semester(pluriel) learning Ccivil Eengineering in a foreign university. I have decided to apply for this programme because I am sure it would strongly ('greatly' serait mieux) enrich my future studies and help me in my prospective career. It is also a great opportunity to improve my English and increase my confidence in passing the TOEFL examinations, which is often asked to be accepted (required?)in the Master's Degree. Moreover I consider this programme as a great opportunity to get in touch with...(article)... Swedish way of life and educational system. I am very curious about different approaches to the Ccivil Eengineering , and there must be many differences between a mountainous country like Switzerland, and Sweden, a country mainly made up with(une autre preposition) coastal towns.
More precisely, I choose XX because it is the ideal place for me. On the one hand, we I can easy (adverbe ici) enjoy the nature ('natural setting' irait mieux ici), because it's an human-scale and nature-orientated city, but on the other hand, it's a young and dynamic city, with an airport and good connection with neighbouring cities.
Then, I don't want to go in Erasmus just to have fun and enjoy a new culture, but also keep a very good educational level. That's why I studied a lot of rankings before making a choice about the university, and I saw that Chalmers had very good rank. Furthermore, I really like the module system of study at Chalmers. I specially appreciate the wide range of offered modules and the freedom in making (l'infinitif ici) your study plan. Many of the modules offered are unique for me, because there is no equivalent at my home university.

Last but not least (cliche, evitez), Finally I know the reputation of Scandinavian countries, and especially of Sweden for its innovative ideas in urbanism and planning, but also in the field of construction. That's why I choose (temps?) to apply at XX University. I was totally convinced when I saw that almost all the courses were related to sustainable development. In this area, XX stay(accorde?) definitely one step ahead of XY(my university), and this is a important point for me because I'm very interested by in this subject, I have found out I would like to specialise in sustainable construction and planning during my prior studies. Since I am (temps?)at XY, I took(temps?) two optional courses related to this topic (one about various environmental policies the first year, and one exactly about sustainable development this year) and I am an active member of ABC, the association for sustainable development at XY. I am also motivated by the fact that there is an equivalent association at XX. The University of XX gives me a chance to get in touch with these subjects through modules from both Department of Civil Eengineering and Department of Town and Regional Planning. I would like to use my stay in XX for further developing (utilisez l'infinitif)my skills in sustainable construction and urban planning, because the possibilities that gives me your University further expand those at my home university (a reformuler).

Finally, I notice that this choice was (utiliser le conditionnel ici) ideal for me, valuable for both my studies and overall general development, because of the friendly and young atmosphere of the city, the “Excellent” rating for teaching of the Civil engineering department and the inspiring, creative, and cosmopolitean environment of one of the largest Swedish universities.

Thank you for considering my request. I look forward to your positive response.




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