Help/ technical writing

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Help/ technical writing
Message from simone90 posted on 31-01-2018 at 03:06:26 (D | E | F)
Hi everyone!
I'm a masters student in engineering and I must write a brief abstract to explain my research. I still have some problems with technical writing. I've been doing my best to improve it as fast as possible once this a major skill to succeed in international research.
Would someone please be kind enough to help me with this abstract? I thank you in advance and sorry about the (too) technical subject.

ABSTRACT: The use of reinforced soil structures (RSS) is a geotechnical response to the quick human dense settlement in urban area. Techniques that insert elements in the soil mass in order to improve its resistant are very ancient in engineering history. In 1966, the French architect Henry Vidal developed the first RSS design method, known as Terre Armée (Reinforced Soil). Currently, the development of new materials and construction techniques have enabled RSS to become more complex and sophisticate. Analysing the influence of the soil compaction and of the facing structure allows a deeper understanding of geotechnical behaviour of RSS. In order to evaluate the impact of soil compaction and facing system in RSS, this work perform computational analyses in different RSSs using finite element method. The finite element method was adopted because it provides more accurate and direct representation to complex real problems such as earthwork structures behaviour. The CRISP92-SC software performed a computational simulation of RSS. The Modified K-Stiffness (2008) and Dantas and Ehrlich (2000) calculation method were used and their results compared to those obtained in numerical simulations. Initially, the influence of the element of discretization was verified using in the finite element mesh. The goal was to investigate if the use of different mesh elements could lead to distinct result to same problem. In a second time, the impact of the compaction and of the type of facing used was verified. For that, results from Almeida (2014) together with the data obtained by this research for structures submitted to the compaction process were employed. The results showed that the compacting has a great influence on the final behaviour of the RSS. Its influence does not correspond only to the effect usually attributed to compaction in common earthworks calculations. Other effects were detected. Ignoring this fact can underestimate the stress on the reinforcement at the lower depths of RSS. The RSS facing structure may also exert a great influence on the deformation and on the resistance. Some types of facing could have a relevant impact on restricting the displacement of RSS base and should not be neglected.

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Edited by lucile83 on 31-01-2018 08:00

Re: Help/ technical writing from gerondif, posted on 31-01-2018 at 11:47:29 (D | E)
Hello
mistakes in blue
I'm a masters student in engineering and I must write a brief abstract to explain my research. I still have some problems with technical writing. I've been doing my best to improve it as fast as possible once this(since this is a major skill to succeed in international research.
Would someone please be kind enough to help me with this abstract? I thank you in advance and sorry about the (too) technical subject.

ABSTRACT: The use of reinforced soil structures (RSS) is a geotechnical response to the quick human dense settlement in urban area(plural would be logical). Techniques that insert elements in the soil mass in order to improve its resistant(you need the noun, not the adjective) are very ancient in engineering history. In 1966, the(suppress it, as you give his name) French architect Henry Vidal developed the first RSS design method, known as Terre Armée (Reinforced Soil). Currently, the development of new materials and construction techniques have enabled RSS to become more complex and sophisticated. Analysing the influence of the soil compaction and of the facing structure allows a deeper understanding of geotechnical behaviour of RSS. In order to evaluate the impact of soil compaction and facing system in RSS, this work performs(3rd person present simple = s !!) computational analyses in different RSSs using the finite element method (use the in the singular). The finite element method was adopted because it provides more accurate and direct representation to complex real problems such as earthwork structures behaviour (normally, in a compound-noun, the first element is singular a brush for your teeth is a toothbrush, laces for your shoes are shoe-laces). The CRISP92-SC software performed a computational simulation of RSS. The Modified K-Stiffness (2008) and Dantas and Ehrlich (2000) calculation method were used and their results compared to those obtained in numerical simulations. Initially, the influence of the element of discretization was verified(checked) using in(why this in ??) the finite element mesh. The goal was to investigate if the use of different mesh elements could lead to distinct results to the same problem. In a second time, the impact of the compaction and of the type of facing used was verified. For that, results from Almeida (2014) together with the data obtained by(from/through) this research for structures submitted to the compaction process were employed. The results showed that the compacting has(had) a great influence on the final behaviour of the RSS. Its influence does not correspond only to the effect usually attributed to compaction in common earthworks calculations. Other effects were detected. Ignoring this fact can underestimate the stress on the reinforcement at the lower depths of RSS (or RSS depths). The RSS facing structure may also exert a great influence on the deformation and on the resistance. Some types of facing could have a relevant impact on restricting the displacement of RSS base and should not be neglected.

Re: Help/ technical writing from simone90, posted on 31-01-2018 at 13:38:25 (D | E)
Hello gerondif! Thank you very much for the correction. It's really kind of you to help me!
I've noticed I have some difficulties with word 'the'. Actually, I cannot really see the logic. When should I can keep it or drop it?
If you have any tip on that I would really appreciate it.
Have a nice day!

Re: Help/ technical writing from gerondif, posted on 01-02-2018 at 00:41:08 (D | E)
Hello
Any grammar book would teach you that, I suppose.
Keep in mind that the is "sort of", a weakened form of this, it means you can show or see or define the object or person mentionned.
Pass me the bread (that is on the table).
The doctor (that you called) will be here shortly.
Where are the keys ? (you both know which keys I am talking about)

Use the when there is only one in the universe:
The earth revolves around the sun.
I like the sea.
Take me to the moon !(Frank Sinatra' song)

But don't use the when you talk about something general that is only in your mind and not in the room.
I like bread ! Cats eat mice. Steel is harder than iron.
Both can be found in the same sentence.
Pass me the bread please ! I like * bread!
I don't like coffee but I like the coffee YOU make !

Re: Help/ technical writing from dsmith, posted on 03-02-2018 at 18:12:02 (D | E)
Hello I will add a couple more suggestions to the great suggestions gerondif already gave.

I will put my suggestions in green.

ABSTRACT: The use of reinforced soil structures (RSS) is a geotechnical response to the quick human dense settlement in urban area(plural would be logical). Techniques that insert elements in the soil mass in order to improve its resistant(you need the noun, not the adjective) are very (avoid the use of very. It is ancient or it is something else. very is not a precise word. Just say the techniques are ancient. or I prefer "have been used for decades/hundreds of years/thousands of years in engineering history") ancient in engineering history. In 1966, the(suppress it, as you give his name) French architect Henry Vidal developed the first RSS design method, known as Terre Armée (Reinforced Soil). Currently, the development of new materials and construction techniques have enabled RSS to become more complex and sophisticated. Analysing the influence of the soil compaction and of the facing structure allows a deeper understanding of geotechnical behaviour of RSS. In order to evaluate the impact of soil compaction and facing system (plural works here as there is not just one system) in RSS, this work performs(3rd person present simple = s !!) computational analyses in different RSSs using the finite element method (use the in the singular). The finite element method was adopted because it provides more accurate and direct representation to complex real problems such as earthwork structures behaviour (normally, in a compound-noun, the first element is singular a brush for your teeth is a toothbrush, laces for your shoes are shoe-laces). The CRISP92-SC software performed a computational simulation of RSS. The Modified K-Stiffness (2008) and (by) Dantas and Ehrlich (2000) calculation method were (was) or methods were used and their results compared to those obtained in numerical simulations. Initially, the influence of the element of discretization was verified(checked) using in(why this in ??) the finite element mesh. The goal was to investigate if the use of different mesh elements could lead to distinct results to the same problem. In a second time (remove in. is there a more precise word than time? For a second test, , the impact of the compaction and of the type of facing used was verified. For that, results from Almeida (2014) together with the data obtained by(from/through) this research for structures submitted to the compaction process were employed. The results showed that the compacting has(had) a great influence on the final behaviour of the RSS. Its influence does not correspond only to the effect usually attributed to compaction in common earthworks calculations. Other effects were detected. Ignoring this fact can underestimate the stress on the reinforcement at the lower depths of RSS (or RSS depths). The RSS facing structure may also exert a great influence on the deformation and on the resistance. Some types of facing could have a relevant impact on restricting the displacement of RSS base and should not be neglected.

Re: Help/ technical writing from simone90, posted on 05-02-2018 at 02:49:38 (D | E)
Hello! Thank you, gerontif for the explanation. Although it may look simple in some case it can be really tricky to non-native speakers.
Thanks you dsmith for your suggestions as well! I really appreciate it!

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