A word in my ear/correction

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A word in my ear/correction
Message from oldtallun posted on 13-02-2012 at 11:21:58 (D | E | F)
Hello,

I am now almost seventy. I have always enjoyed writing but have been too busy earning a living to try and get published. I am now retired with a pension. I have been told by an agent in London that they like my books and will take me on. IF I CAN IMPROVE MY ENGLISH. Particularly PASSIVE VOICE. I use "MS Word" ------

He was then labelled a scab, a frightening thing to be called in those days. Word tells me this is passive, so I changed it to. ---

A frightening thing to be called in those days was a scab, and that is what he was called. Word tells me this is passive also.

Please help. Where am I going wrong?

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Edited by lucile83 on 13-02-2012 12:58

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Re: A word in my ear/correction from violet91, posted on 13-02-2012 at 12:14:52 (D | E)
Hello ,

What a lovely message here , lucky you who are or about to be published in London !
One thing, though :
Wouldn't your passive sentence go better this way ?

--- A frightening thing to be called a scab in those days (it was) !
---Or : Being called a scab must have been ( was) a frightening thing in those days ...

Now, what do you think ? Have a nice day and really enjoyable retirement as a writer and publisher ! Good luck ! So long !

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Re: A word in my ear/correction from alep, posted on 13-02-2012 at 12:35:00 (D | E)
Hello oldtallun,

"They kept calling me a scab, a frightening thing in those days"
"They kept calling me a scab, which frightened the guts out of me!"
This is plain active, isn't?

From an old bloke of 72,
alep

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Re: A word in my ear/correction from oldtallun, posted on 16-02-2012 at 17:28:11 (D | E)
Many thanks for the advice from all who replied.

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