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Oral/mythes et héros

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Oral/mythes et héros
Message de anna40 posté le 06-05-2018 à 21:43:55 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je passe mon oral d'anglais dans pas très longtemps, cela m'arrangerait beaucoup si vous pouviez m'aider dans la correction de mon script.
Merci pour vos réponses.

I am going to talk about the notion of myths and heroes. Nowadays, myths and heroes take a big place in our society. Indeed, we can see them everywhere whiter in television, radio or on our favourite cereal packet. Before understanding why they have taken such a big place, we need to define a hero and a myth. To me, a hero is someone brave who haven’t necessarily magic powers. He is a person who is admired for his courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities; a person who has performed a heroic act or simply our own personal hero, our role model, who we look up to. A myth can be defined as a story about gods or heroes, it can be a popular belief or a tradition or a false notion. But why are myths and heroes so important to our society? In today’s society to what extent is there a need for myths and heroes? That’s what we will ask by focusing on the American Dream before seeing the importance of legendary heroes.

I The American dream
The American dream is characterized by the idea of an America full of promises, and very attractive. It let people think that anybody leaving in America, thanks to courage, work, force and determination, can succeed so, it’s an example of myth. The rags-to-riches stories of American people who grew from paupers into powerful have become typical examples of the American Dream. John D Rockefeller is the typical example of the American Dream, born in a medium family; he founded the standard oil company which is now one of the first big trusts in the US. He is an example of social climbing and the example that everything is possible. Steve Jobs is also like Rockefeller, self-made men. Indeed, he was adopted by a lower middle class family but he worked hard to become a massive figure on the world of electronics. Steve Jobs revolutionised the world of computers with, Apple. Nowadays, everyone knows what is Apple, Steve Jobs made sure that when you see a bite apple you directly think about his brand. Over the years he climbed the social ladder. He was the very illustration of successful business. Steve Jobs is considered like a hero because to make the top he was a hard-worker. Today he remains a role model, an example of success, another example of the American Dream. To resume, the American dream is important in today’s society because it’s a hope for a lot of people, to start from nothing and have everything. That’s why; a lot of people migrate to the United States to live that American Dream.

II Legendary heroes
Legendary heroes can also explain why myths and heroes are important in today’s society. Legendary heroes can be fictional or real, legendary can correspond to two meanings, whiter they are taken from legends or they have accomplished exceptional things to the point of eliciting a sort of common yet real legends. Churchill was one of them because he saved his country from Nazism as a prime minister, he did everything himself and he was ready to do everything to make sure to do what he believed in, he shown some courage and determination on one of the most difficult period on the history. We can also talk about Robin Hood, who stole from the rich and gave to the poor, he is a fictional hero because we have no proof that he existed. Yet, whether it is with Robin Hood or Churchill we can see that heroes and myths are important in our society because they are role models, examples to follow, they are like a goal to achieve.

To conclude, there is a need for myths and heroes on today’s society because we always want to have a better life, to climb the social ladder and the American dreams is a hope, a way to reassure himself that our dream are possible. Furthermore, legendary heroes are necessary in our society because they are role models; we try our best to become like them. However, we have to be careful because the American Dream concerns a very small part of people, a lot of people doesn’t manage to realise their dreams even if they are really motivated.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 09-05-2018 23:15


Réponse : Oral/mythes et héros de laure95, postée le 10-05-2018 à 10:06:11 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- Nowadays, myths and heroes take (je mettrais au présent en be+ing)a big place in our society.
- whiter: ?
- in televsision: pas la bonne préposition.
- on our favourite cereal packet (pluriel).
- to me: pas la bonne préposition.
- a hero is someone brave who haven’t (faute de conjugaison) necessarily magic(al) powers.
- But why are myths and heroes so important to (pas la bonne préposition)our society?

I The American dream
- It let (faute de conjugaison)people think
- Steve Jobs is also like Rockefeller, self-made men (mettre au singulier).
- what is Apple: ordre des mots.
- a bite apple
- Over the years he climbed (present perfect)the social ladder.
- He was (présent)the very illustration of successful business.
- have everything: mal dit.
- to live that American Dream: mal dit.

II Legendary heroes
- whiter: ?
- he shown: temps?
- some courage and determination on (pas la bonne préposition)one of the most difficult period on the (même remarque)history.
- whether it is with Robin Hood or Churchill: mal dit.

- To conclude, there is a need for myths and heroes on (pas la bonne préposition)today’s society
- a way to reassure himself
- we try (ajouter un verbe)our best
- a lot of people doesn’t manage (faute de conjugaison) to realise their dreams



Réponse : Oral/mythes et héros de delf2312, postée le 10-05-2018 à 10:55:42 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Rien à ajouter par rapport à la correction précédente sauf que comme tu l'as fait remarqué, c'est un oral.
Il va sans dire que le correcteur laisse plus facilement passer une petite erreur de grammaire (qu'ils n'aura sans doute pas le temps de noter) que des erreurs de prononciation majeures.
Je me permets donc de te donner un conseil, même si ton ou ta prof s'en est sans doute charger : entraîne toi à lire à voix haute ta présentation, enregistre toi et vois si tu tiens le temps demandé. Pour les mots sur lesquels tu n'es pas sûre de la prononciation, tu peux utiliser un site du style "best text to speech, oddcast.com" ou le haut parleur des dictionnaires en ligne.
Bon courage !

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Modifié par lucile83 le 10-05-2018 14:57




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