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Correction/Bac

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction/Bac
Message de hugoch posté le 01-02-2020 à 09:35:52 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je suis en préparation de mon oral d'anglais qui a lieu mardi prochain et j'ai fini d'écrire mes deux notions que je dois préparer. J'ai envoyé mes notions à ma prof d'anglais pour avoir son avis et elle m'a dit qu'il y avait encore quelques erreurs grammaticales mais qu'en tant que professeure elle n'avait pas le droit de me dire lesquelles ( consignes de l'académie ). Donc je voudrais savoir si parmi vous il y aurait des personnes qui pourraient m'aider ?
Cordialement,
Hugo
PS : Demandez-moi au préalable si vous souhaitez utiliser ma notion pour vos oraux, j'ai pris beaucoup de temps à faire ce travail ;)
Notion Spaces and Exchanges

I’m going to talk to you about the notion of Spaces and Exchanges. To start it is important to define this notion. For me Spaces and Exchanges is our modern world. Indeed it is built on the exploration and the conquest of new spaces. Nations are becoming more and more dependant on each other and our world seems geographically smaller then ever before thanks to improved transportation and communication systems. Throughout history trade, emigration, communication and conquest have brought about numerous cultural, political and economical exchanges across the world.
To illustrate this notion we are going to ask ourselves what are the reasons for immigration and more particularly in the USA.
Firstly, we will look the causes of the immigration, then we will talk about the difficulties of immigrating and finally we will talk about the alternatives.

I)There are several reasons why people immigrate. The first is money because many people hope to have a better economic life. They hope to find a better job and help their families who are sometimes in another country.
It may also be for cultural reasons. There are religions and cultures that are not accepted and are persecuted in different parts of the world.
Finally there are still today dictactorship who do not respect the population and impose a way of life on them. For example this is the case of several countries in the Middle East.
All people have good reasons to emigrate and there is a multitude of different reasons to escape of his country. But it’s not all the time easy.


II)In the cas of the USA immigrants had to face a lot of dangers and difficulties on their way to America. They had to save up money for the trip. They had to leave their home country and say goodbye to people they loved and would never see again. They had to travel to the ports of embarkation. On the way, they could be attacked by outlaws. Sometimes, they had to stop on the way in order to work for food. They had to wait in the ports until they found a boat. The trip was wery long, hard and dangerous. There were storms, boats were not very safe at that time. They could get ill and die on the way.
In addition, Donald Trump's migration policy is very strict. There have already been many men, women and children who died trying to cross the Mexican border.
Conditions in the past were even more dire because once arrived in the USA, laws allowed wealthy whites to buy black men and women captured in their villages to become slaves. They lost all freedom and were totally subject to the orders of their masters.
To conclude, we are now going to talk about the alternatives that can save migrants from having to leave their countries for economic reasons.


III)New technologies and internet have influenced the way of communicating and exchanging. We can now work with people on the other side of the world. This has helped create jobs and help people. Large companies like Apple, Amazon and even Google have been able to emerge and employ people all over the world. Globalization has enabled several developing countries to have a better economic situation.

In conclusion, even if millions of people continue to immigrate to seek better stability (political or cultural) the conditions have evolved and the "American Dream" is over. We can now make a success of our life almost everywhere on earth with a computer and Internet.




Réponse : Correction/Bac de here4u, postée le 01-02-2020 à 12:02:44 (S | E)
Notion: Spaces and Exchanges

I’m going to talk to you about the notion of Spaces and Exchanges. To start XXXX it is important to define this notion. For me "Spaces and Exchanges" is (mal dit)our modern world. Indeed it is built on the exploration and the conquest of new spaces. Nations are becoming more and more dependant on each other and our world seems geographically smaller then ever before thanks to improved transportation and communication systems. Throughout history trade? (voc ou ponctuation?), emigration, communication and conquest have brought about numerous cultural, political and economical exchanges across the world.

To illustrate this notion we are going to ask ourselves what are the reasons for immigration(interrogative indirecte à reformuler) and more particularly in the USA.
Firstly, we will look the causes of the immigration, then we will talk about the difficulties of immigrating and finally we will talk about the alternatives.

I) There are several reasons why people immigrate. The first XXX is money because many people hope to have a better economic life. They hope to find a better job and help their families who are sometimes in another country.
It may also be for cultural reasons. There are religions and cultures that are not accepted and are persecuted in different parts of the world.
Finally there are still today dictactorshipS (ordre des mots) who do not respect the population and impose a way of life on them. For example this is the case of several countries in the Middle East.
All people have good reasons to emigrate and there is a multitude of different reasons to escape of his country. But it’s not all the time easy.

II) In the cas of the USA, immigrants had to face a lot of dangers and difficulties on their way to America. They had to save up money for the trip. They had to leave their home country and say goodbye to people they loved and would never see again. They had to travel to the ports of embarkation. On the way, they could be attacked by outlaws. Sometimes, they had to stop on the way in order to work for food. They had to wait in the ports until they found a boat. The trip was wery long, hard and dangerous. There were storms, boats were not very safe at that time. They could get ill and die on the way.
In addition, Donald Trump's migration policy is very strict. There have already been many men, women and children who died trying to cross the Mexican border.
Conditions in the past(trop vague!) were even more dire because once arrived in the USA, laws allowed wealthy whites to buy black men and women captured in their villages to become slaves. They lost all freedom and were totally subject to the orders of their masters. (Soyez plus précis ... Parlez-vous de l'immigration ou de l'esclavage ? )
To conclude, we are now going to talk about the alternatives that can save migrants from having to leave their countries for economic reasons.

III) New technologies and XXX internet have influenced the way of communicating and exchanging. We can now work with people on the other side of the world. This has helped create jobs and help people. Large companies like Apple, Amazon and even Google have been able to emerge and employ people all over the world. Globalization has enabled several developing countries to have a better economic situation.
In conclusion, even if millions of people continue to immigrate to seek better stability (political or cultural) the conditions have evolved and the "American Dream" is over. We can now make a success of our life almost everywhere on earth with a computer and XXX Internet.(I'm sure this will be good news to many! )

Où sont les références précises aux documents étudiés (elles doivent illustrer et appuyer le propos) ?



Réponse : Correction/Bac de gerondif, postée le 06-02-2020 à 14:37:42 (S | E)
Bonjour
Vous nous disiez avoir un oral mardi, or, ce jeudi, je vois que:
Dernière connexion au club : samedi 01 février 2020 à 09:32:43.
Avez-vous consulté le travail que vous demandiez aux correcteurs de ce site ?




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