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Correction/exposé

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction/exposé
Message de soiz2502 posté le 29-02-2020 à 18:07:32 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je dois faire un exposé sur la chanson Stupid Girl de Pink.
Pouvez-vous me dire quelles sont mes erreurs :
Merci d'avance pour votre aide !

Stupid girl was performed by the american singer and song writer Pink in 2006. To short, It’s a criticism of the woman’s vision in the society. In this presentation, we gonna analyse the song verse by verse for a better analysis. We can separate the song into three parts. Fisrt, pink make a caricature which exaggerates women’s clichies and shows the close destiny of women, according to the society. For example the physic obsession. Then she gives her opinnion about the subject. And Finally she uses provocation recuring. To begin, the chorus, wich is repeat during all the song, shows how to behave with men that women might think. Then she uses three captivating words « Porno Paparazzi girl » to illustrate it. She underlines that « I don’t wanna be a stupid girl » and she refuses to be like it. In the first verse, Pink says we find these girls in fashions and luxury shops like « Fred Segal » and she presents them as tarts in looking for attention and money. Then, she carry on saying that all the dreams of young girls like become a president will don’t be a reality and that their distiny is to become a stupid girl. Besides she says a small sentence to show her anxiety about the inexistence of smart people "where, have the smart people gone?" In the second part, she makes a metapore associating this way with a disease which is « growing up ». And when she says « I’m scared that there ain’t a cure The world believes it » she denounces the fact the society make us believe that, in a short time women will be not judged by their physic anymore. And it becomes her totally crazy. Moreover, she affirms she is relieved to don’t be this type of girl : « that will never be me » and she wants to see « outcasts and girls with ambitions ». The superficial side is highligting because girls would be always obsessed by their physical apparence even if « disasters are all around ». At the end of the song , she remakes the chorus adding in the choir « do ya thing ». It’s like a little angel’s voice who says that if you don’t wanna be a stupid girl, be what you want. In the music video it’s Pink who says that to the little girl like she was giving an advice. Finally, the singer uses provocation to say out loud what everyone else is thinking. For example « will you fuck me ». Besides, Pink critics girls who think living in a perfect world and who ignore realities, a « lucky girl ». To make an analysis of the music video,it illustrates the remarks made by the singer. It shows a little girl who is watching TV. The TV portrays differents « clichies women » who represents the vision of the society. We can see a woman who is going shopping, or an other who is washing a car with a sexy attitud. At the end of the video, the little girl decides to choose the rugby ball instead of the doll. It’s what Pink wants to see. Furthermore, the singer says « stupid girl » because she doesn’t consider this type of women as women but as littles girls because they are immatures and tarts. To conclude,the emotional response that the song evokes is mocking and it makes us laugh. But gradually, it becomes us aware of the real message.The message of the song is a very powerful one that encourages young girls to be intelligent, have self-respect, be independent and not allow themselves to be influenced negatively by certain “dumb” trends promoted by certain female celebrities they see on television. In effect, Pink is accused to have pointed out celebrities like the Olsen sisters, Paris Hilton,etc… Actually, these clichies are less presents than before but they remain for example, the TV- reality programs.

------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 01-03-2020 07:43
lucile83



Réponse : Correction/exposé de gerondif, postée le 29-02-2020 à 23:21:06 (S | E)
Hello
Erreurs en bleu
Stupid girl was performed by the american (majuscule) singer and song writer Pink in 2006. To short(incomplet), It’s a criticism of the woman’s vision in the society. In this presentation, we gonna(fait un peu populaire ou américain anti grammatical) analyse the song verse by verse for a better analysis. We can separate the song into three parts. Fisrt, pink make(le s du présent!!) a caricature which exaggerates women’s clichies and shows the close destiny(sens ?) of women, according to the society. For example the physic(mauvais adjectif) obsession. Then she gives her opinnion about the subject. And Finally she uses provocation recuring. To begin with, the chorus, wich(orthographe) is repeat(forme du verbe) during all the song, shows how to behave with men that women might think.(sens ?) Then she uses three captivating words « Porno Paparazzi girl » to illustrate it. She underlines that « I don’t wanna be a stupid girl » and she refuses to be like it. In the first verse, Pink says we find these girls in fashions and luxury shops like « Fred Segal » and she presents them as tarts in looking for attention and money. Then, she carry(le s du présent) on saying that all the dreams of young girls like become(gérondif) a president will don’t be(revoir le futur!!) a reality and that their distiny is to become a stupid girl(à mettre au pluriel). Besides she says(on dit quelque chose, on ne dit pas une phrase, on la prononce) a small sentence to show her anxiety about the inexistence of smart people "where, have the smart people gone?" In the second part, she makes a metapore associating this way with a disease which is « growing up ». And when she says « I’m scared that there ain’t a cure The world believes it » she denounces the fact the society make us believe that, in a short time, women will be not judged by their physic anymore. And it becomes(mauvais choix de verbe) her totally crazy. Moreover, she affirms she is relieved to don’t be(revoir les infinitifs négatifs) this type of girl : « that will never be me » and she wants to see « outcasts and girls with ambitions ». The superficial side is highligting(souligné, pas soulignant) because girls would be always(inversez) obsessed by with their physical apparence even if « disasters are all around ». At the end of the song , she remakes the chorus adding in the choir « do ya thing ». It’s like a little angel’s voice who(mauvais choix de relatif, voice n'est pas un humain) says that if you don’t wanna be a stupid girl, be what you want. In the music video it’s Pink who says that to the little girl like(as if + subjonctif) she was giving an advice(advice est un mot collectif signifiant des conseils, pour n'en prendre qu'un, il faut dire a piece of advice). Finally, the singer uses provocation to say out loud what everyone else is thinking. For example « will you fuck me ». Besides, Pink critics(critics, ce sont des critiques littéraires...nom commun pluriel, pas un verbe) girls who think they are living in a perfect world and who ignore realities, a « lucky girl ». To make an analysis of the music video,it illustrates the remarks made by the singer. It shows a little girl who is watching TV. The TV portrays differents(pas de pluriel aux adjectifs) « clichies women » who represents the vision of the society. We can see a woman who is going shopping, or an other who is washing a car with a sexy attitude. At the end of the video, the little girl decides to choose the rugby ball instead of the doll. It’s what Pink wants to see. Furthermore, the singer says « stupid girl » because she doesn’t consider this type of women as women but as littles girls because they are immatures and tarts. To conclude,the emotional response that the song evokes is mocking and it makes us laugh. But gradually, it becomes(ça me rend triste = it makes me sad.) us aware of the real message.The message of the song is a very powerful one that encourages young girls to be intelligent, have self-respect, be independent and not allow themselves to be influenced negatively by certain “dumb” trends promoted by certain female celebrities they see on television. In effect, Pink is accused to have pointed out celebrities like the Olsen sisters, Paris Hilton,etc… Actually, these clichies are less presents than before but they remain for example, the TV- reality programs.




Réponse : Correction/exposé de soiz2502, postée le 01-03-2020 à 18:46:30 (S | E)
D'accord merci beaucoup !




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