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US military/correction

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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US military/correction
Message de zawa posté le 28-11-2012 à 16:51:02 (S | E | F)
Bonjour tout le monde.

J'ai le resumé d'un texte à faire. Voici mon travail. Serait-il possible que quelqu'un jette un coup d'oeil pour voir s'il y a beaucoup de fautes de grammaire, pour que je puisse les corriger ?
Merci d'avance !

This article from the British Daily the Guardian was published on the Nineth of November 2012.
This article deals with warnings from the U.S. military about the climate change.
It is entitled “US military warned to prepare for consequences of climate change”.
I have chosen to read from line 11 to 14 to emphasise the gravity of these predictions.
The structure of my summary will fall into 2 parts.
First I will talk about that provides the U.S. Army as climate change.
Then I will expose what should be the consequences of such climate change, and how the U.S. military would limit problems.
As expressed at the end of the text there may be different "climate surprises".
There may be just one disaster which would really sharp and significant as (I quote L21) “a food price shock”, or a succession of smaller event which will be like the straw that will break the camel's back
The Pentagon provides particularly I quote L9 “sea-level rise, drought, epidemics”.

Mais pourquoi ces changements climatiques dérangeraient-ils ? Et surtout comment l’armée américaine voudrait-elle nous amener à les éviter, ou au moins les limiter ? C’est ce que nous allons voir dans une seconde partie.

But why are climate changes disturbing? And especially how the U.S. military would lead us to avoid or at least limit them? This is what we will see in a second part.
The text informs us that thirty U.S. base are threatened because of potential flooding.
We can understand that climate change would cause serious material damage especially on coasts.
That leads us two solutions: try to fight the nature ( for example : dike ) or leak disaster. In all cases of these catastrophes would create expensive spending.
Natural disasters and problems due to I quote L9 "epidemics" could also cause humans damage.
The U.S. military is worried because these climate changes could also adding fuel to existing conflicts.
Water shortages, the reduction of the area of a Country due to the sea-level, or food deficits could lead to international conflicts.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 28-11-2012 19:30


Réponse: US military/correction de bluestar, postée le 28-11-2012 à 17:40:26 (S | E)
Bonjour...

This article from the British dDaily the Guardian was published on the Nineth ninth of November 2012.
This article deals with warnings from the U.S. military about the climate change.
It is entitled “US military warned to prepare for consequences of climate change”.
I have chosen to read from line 11 to 14 to emphasise the gravity of these predictions.
The structure of my summary will fall into 2 parts.
First I will talk about that provides the U.S. Army as climate change>.(Ce n'a pas de sens - il >faut la reformuler)Then I will expose what should be the consequences of such climate change, and how the U.S. military would limit problems.

As expressed at the end of the text there may be different "climate surprises".

There may be just one disaster which would (verbe manquant) really sharp and significant as like (I quote L21) “a food price shock”, or a succession of smaller event which will be like the straw that will break the camel's back

The Pentagon provides (mentions) particularly I quote L9 “sea-level rise, drought, epidemics”.

Mais pourquoi ces changements climatiques dérangeraient-ils ? Et surtout comment l’armée américaine voudrait elle nous amener à les éviter, ou au moins les limiter ? C’est ce que nous allons voir dans une seconde partie.

But why are climate changes disturbing? And especially how the U.S. military would lead us (ordre des mots)to avoid or at least limit them? This is what we will see in a second part.

The text informs us that thirty U.S. bases are threatened because of potential flooding.

We can understand that climate change would cause serious material damage, especially on coasts.

That leads us (prep. manquant) two solutions: try to fight the nature ( for example : building dikes ) or leak disaster. In all cases of dealing with these catastrophes would create expensive spending. be expensive.

Natural disasters and problems due to I quote L9 "epidemics" could also cause humans damage.

The U.S. military is worried because these climate changes could also adding fuel to existing conflicts.
Water shortages, the reduction of the area of a Ccountry due to the rising sea-levels, or food deficits could lead to international conflicts.




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