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Correction/ Waste production

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction/ Waste production
Message de tsape01 posté le 10-05-2013 à 09:21:07 (S | E | F)
Hello!

I've once again chosen a theme and I've treated it. I'd like you to correct any errors, please.
The issue (The theme) in question is the waste production (regarding food).

*Thus why the amount of garbage increase day by day, more and more?
*What are the consequences for nature? *what can we do to fight (Could I also use here Gerondif: WHAT CAN WE DO FOR FIGHTING AGAINST...) against the increase of waste in our society?
Reading my text, you'll get answers of these questions.
We can see that the countries which have the largest amount of garbage are developed countries. We have among others (IS IT RIGHT?: AMONG OTHERS= ENTRE AUTRE) the USA, England and Germany. According to internet, television and news broadcast, the countries where there are a lot of pile of rubbish are the industrialised countries such as the countries that I've mentioned above. In the developing coutries it's not lower than in the industrialised countries because they invest much more in the production of food because of the large population. For example the United States. By reason of daily advertisements that appear on television where we show new food product appeared on the market. As soon as we present a new contiment on tv and when it has been said that this new condiment gives a particular and very good flavour to food, the citizen rush in market, in stores in order to buy it and to taste it. And they do not like, throw it, although it's still eatable. Some people after their breakfast or noon food, when there is a rest of lunch they either throw or keep it in the fridge. If nobody eats or if it's no edible, the throw. As consequences we have the pollution of the environment. Plant have troubles to grow up furthermore throwing the food or platics on the ground instead of throwing it in trash can. The air becomes unbreathable due to lack of cleanliness. In this way the air becomes toxic and citizen also becomes vulnerable to diseases. To fight fight against increasing of garbages the citizen should be sensitized about the negative consequences of increase waste in our society. The people should eat sensibly. The pledge system with bottles must be internationalized. The recycling system must be more developed and the waste separation must be respected.

Thank you very much for all your corrections !!!!
tsape01

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 10-05-2013 10:00


Réponse: Correction/ Waste production de lucile83, postée le 11-05-2013 à 18:16:17 (S | E)
Anyone?



Réponse: Correction/ Waste production de tsape01, postée le 11-05-2013 à 19:32:41 (S | E)
Hello "lucile83"!
I'am also surprised like you !
Until now no correction.
I'm still waiting and I hope to have a correction !
With respect
tsape01



Réponse: Correction/ Waste production de lucile83, postée le 12-05-2013 à 12:07:29 (S | E)
hello,

Erreurs en bleu, corrections directes en vert

*Thus why the amount of garbage increase///forme interrogative non respectée day by day, more and more?
*What are the consequences for nature? *what can we do to fight (Could I also use here Gerondif: WHAT CAN WE DO FOR FIGHTING AGAINST...) against the increase of waste in our society? to fight est mieux, plus courant
Reading my text, you'll get answers of these questions.
We can see that the countries which that est mieux have the largest amount of garbage are developed countries. We have among others (IS IT RIGHT?: AMONG OTHERS= ENTRE AUTRE)among other things the USA, England and Germany. According to internet, television and news broadcast, the countries where there are a lot of pile of rubbish are the industrialised countries such as the countries that I've mentioned above. In the developing coutries it's not lower than in the industrialised countries because they invest much more in the production of food because of the large population. For example the United States. By reason of daily advertisements that appear on television where we show new food product appeared on the marketphrase bizarre. As soon as we present a new contiment on tv and when it has been said that this new condiment gives a particular and very good flavour to food, the citizen rush in market, in stores in order to buy it and to taste it. And they do not like, throw it, although it's still eatable. Some people after their breakfast or noon food, when there is mal dit a rest of lunch they either throw or keep it in the fridge. If nobody eats or if it's no edible, the throw .... As consequences we have the pollution of the environment. Plant have troubles to grow upponctuation furthermore throwing the food or platics on the ground instead of throwing it in trash can. The air becomes unbreathable due to lack of cleanliness. In this way the air becomes toxic and citizen also becomes plural is better vulnerable to diseases. To fight fight against increasing of garbages the citizen should be sensitized about the negative consequences of increase waste in our society. The people should eat sensibly. The pledge system with bottles must be internationalized. The recycling system must be more developed and the waste separation must be respected.



Réponse: Correction/ Waste production de tsape01, postée le 12-05-2013 à 17:16:27 (S | E)
Bonsoir!
Un grand merci à vous "lucile83" pour votre correction.
J'ai retravaillé le texte en fonction de votre correction.
Voici le resultat :

*Thus why do the amount of garbage increase day by day, more and more?
 *What are the consequences for nature? *what can we do to fight against the increase of waste in our society? Reading my text, you'll get answers of these questions.
 We can see that the countries that have the largest amount of garbage are developed countries. We have among other things the USA, England and Germany. According to internet, television and news broadcast, the countries where there are a lot of rubbish are the industrialised countries such as the countries that I've mentioned above. In the developing coutries it's not lower than in the industrialised countries because they invest much more in the production of food because of the large population. For example the United States. By reason of daily advertisements that appear on television where peoples could see new food product, which appeared on the market. As soon as  a new condiment is presented on tv and when it has been said on tv that this new condiment gives a particular flavour/taste to food, the citizen rush into market, into stores in order to buy it and to taste it. And they do not like, throw it, although it's still eatable. Some people after their breakfast or noon food, when if there is  a rest of lunch they either throw or keep it in the fridge. If nobody eats or if it's no edible, they throw it. As consequences we have the pollution of the environment. Plants have troubles  growing up. Furthermore throwing the food or platics on the ground instead of throwing it in trash can. The air becomes unbreathable due to lack of cleanliness. In this way the air becomes toxic and citizens also become  vulnerable to diseases. To fight against the  increase of wastes the citizen should be aware of the negative consequences of increase waste in our society. The people should eat sensibly. The pledge system with bottles must be internationalized. The recycling system must be more developed and the waste separation must be respected. 

Merci beaucoup en avance pour une nouvelle correction si c'est nécessaire.
Respectueusement
tsape01



Réponse: Correction/ Waste production de kvcarter, postée le 15-05-2013 à 00:16:32 (S | E)
Bonsoir! J'ai fait une correction (excusez mon français terrible en avance; je suis anglais!)

So why does the amount of garbage increase more and more, day by day?
What are the consequences for nature? What can we do to fight against the increase of waster in our society? By reading my text, you'll get the answers to these questions.

We can see that the countries that have the largest amount of garbage are developed countries. We have among other things in the USA, England and Germany. According to the internet, television and news broadcasts, the countries where there is lots of rubbish are the industrialised countries such as those that I've mentioned above. In the developing countries, it's not lower than in the industrialised countries because they invest much more into the production of food due to their large populations.

The United States, for instance; because of daily advertisements that appear on television where people can see new food products on sale. As soon as a new condiment that has been said to give a particular flavour/taste to food is presented on TV, people rush into shops and stores to buy and taste it. (c'était très difficile de corriger mais je dirais que ça sonne mieux maintenant)

And they do not throw it away, although it's still edible. Some people after their breakfast or lunch either throw it away or keep it if there is some left. If nobody eats or if it's not edible, then they throw it away (on peut aussi utiliser 'then they chuck it' mais c'est informel est ça dépend de qui va voir cette rédaction!).

Because of this, we have polluted the environment. Plants have trouble growing. Furthermore we throw food or plastics on the ground instead of throwing it in trash can. The air becomes unbreathable due to lack of cleanliness. In this way the air becomes toxic and people also become vulnerable to diseases. To fight against the increase of waste, people should be aware of the negative consequences of increased waste in our society. People should eat sensibly. The pledge system with bottles must be internationalized. The recycling system must be further developed and the separation of waste must be respected.

J'espère que ça marche pour vous et je suis désolé qu'il y ait beaucoup de corrections!



Réponse: Correction/ Waste production de tsape01, postée le 15-05-2013 à 08:56:54 (S | E)
Bonsoir "kvcarter"!

Un grand merci à vous pour cette correction si détaillée. Je l'ai lu en détail et j'ai compris mes erreurs...j'ai découvert quelques nouveaux mots dans votre correction.
Par ailleur, je trouve votre français exélant et je me suis rendu compte que vous êtes un nouveau membre sur le site. Welcome to "AnglaisFacile.com".
A très bientôt j'espère ... Et merci encore pour votre correction.

Cordialement
tsape01




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