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Oral/Locations and power

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Oral/Locations and power
Message de mimiblob posté le 02-05-2014 à 14:48:40 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,

Voici un script de mon oral que je passe d'ici peu. Je pense avoir fait quelques fautes et me demandais si quelqu'un pourrait m'indiquer mes erreurs, s'il vous plaît ?

I’m going to talk about the notion of locations and forms of power and particularly about the power of radio. . To begin with, I’d like to state the definition of power. The power is the ability to exert control over somebody. This power can be exercised by the government, by individuals, even by powerful ideas.
The problematic of the notion is : How radio changed from a political power to a free one ?In a first part, we are going to weigh the history of the radio and in a second part, we are going to weigh the place of the radio today.

Firstly, I studied two speeches in class : “The King’s speech” and “Churchill’s speech”. Radio was created to communicate and was used to broadcast political ideas. The first speech is the king’s Speech which George VI broadcast to his people in Britain, and throughout the Empire, immediately after Britain’s Declaration of War against Germany on September 3, 1939. King George was speaking to a huge crowd and his stammer was a real impediment to communicate. He is using long sentences which makes it all the more difficult for him to speak. Then, the second speech is Churchill’s speech. Churchill was a master at both writing and delivering speeches. The many memorable ones he made during the war have been credited with galvanising national spirit and helping to inspire eventual victory. In this speech, it doesn’t repeating the words : “Blood, Toil, Tears and Sweat”. This two speeches was listened to by millions of people throughout the world. Moreover, radio was powerful because pirate radios were very attractive in the 60s. They were called “pirate radios” because it’s illegal and they were the only means to fight against the domination of the BBC. Pirate radios contributed to the musical revolution of the 1960s because they enabled to discover rock’n’roll. He was prohibited/banned in Great Britain while it was wide spread in America. Pirates radio illustrated the notion of locations and forms of power because we can see the domination of BBC until the 1960s in Great Britain. So, at the time, radio was a powerful device to lead the nation and to make revolution.

However, today the place of radio has change. In the past, radio had a lot of power but nowadays, there are new media to communicate information. Indeed, the Internet is more powerful than the radio because people listen less and less to the radio. They prefer the Internet or TV. For example, in the past “The king’s speech” was broadcasted but nowadays, a speech of the President is watched on TV and not listened to on the radio. But the document “Clear channel” proves that radio is still listened to, even if it’s power is limited, the radio retains some power. However, the document was written in 2001 and at this period it was the beginning of the Internet and a majority of people hadn’t Internet.

In conclusion, the radio is still a place of power but it’s less important than before, like in 1960s with pirate radios because new generation prefer the Internet or to watch TV.

Merci d'avance,
Cordialement.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 02-05-2014 19:18


Réponse: Oral/Locations and power de bluduck2, postée le 02-05-2014 à 15:27:58 (S | E)
Hello mimiblob ,
Tout d'abord quelques remarques de vocabulaire :
ligne 1 remplacez to "state" par un verbe moins catégorique .
" 3 "problematic" est un adjectif ;formulez différemment votre question.
" 15 "information" veut dire "renseignements "
A la fin ,dites "As a conclusion"
Précisez la période dont vous parlez " before??the fifties ? the sixties ? the XXIst century?

Remarques de grammaire
ligne 3 Si vous posez une question,utilisez un auxiliaire
ligne 9 Que représente "it",pronom personnel neutre ?
Que veut dire "it doesn't repeat "?
ligne 11 Si vous évoquez les années 60, utilisez le simple past
ligne 12 Que represente le pronom personnel "He" ?
ligne 15 Present perfect =have+P.Passé
ligne 17 Plutôt que "the hadn't" ,dites "they didn't have the internet"
ligne 18 Vous confondez "its" adjectif possessif neutre et "it is" ,verbe être au present simple.
I hope this helps .
Bluduck2

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Modifié par lucile83 le 02-05-2014 19:18
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