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Correction /Venice

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction /Venice
Message de anisaaa posté le 05-06-2014 à 12:41:46 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
j'ai fait une rédaction en anglais, est-ce que quelqu'un pourrait la corriger s'il vous plait ?
Merci beaucoup d'avance.

My Holidays
Last April, I went to Venice for one week. I spent this journey with my friends and my teachers. We traveled by bus and stayed in a small hotel.
The first day, we visited Verona and we went a little time to shopping. I even bought my favorite nail polish.
The other days, we visited Venice, Murano and Burano. There are splendid places. We also saw a lot of churches, canals and historic monuments.
Every evening, we were completely tired but we were too excited and we made a lot of noise. And we could not get up at the morning.
The day before the last was “the rest day”. We went for a walk near the hotel then we ate and went to the sea. We even entered in the sea, it was glacial. At the evening, we ate our dinner in the hotel and we prepared for the disco. We had great fun this day. There were my best holidays.
Few days later, we must still go to the school.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 05-06-2014 15:02


Réponse: Correction /Venice de sherry48, postée le 05-06-2014 à 13:25:47 (S | E)
Hello.

My Holidays
Last April, I went to Venice for one week. I spent this journey with my friends and my teachers. We traveled by bus and stayed in a small hotel.
The first day, we visited Verona and we went a little time to shopping. I even bought my favorite nail polish.
The other days, we visited Venice, Murano and Burano. There are splendid places. We also saw a lot of churches, canals and historic monuments.
Every evening, we were completely tired but we were too excited and we made a lot of noise. And we could not get up at the morning.
The day before the last was “the rest day”. We went for a walk near the hotel then we ate and went to the sea. We even entered in the sea, but it was glacial. At the evening, we ate our dinner in the hotel and we prepared for the disco. We had great fun this day. There were my best holidays.
__ Few days later, we must still go to the school. /we had to go to school.

1. You can spend time, but not the best word for journey.
2. If using went, just 'went shopping'. Spent time shopping also works.
3. A better way to say this--The next to last day.
4. This day is close (in time). You need another word to speak of a day that is more distant. Same idea for there.

Sherry

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Modifié par sherry48 le 06-06-2014 00:30





Réponse: Correction /Venice de anisaaa, postée le 05-06-2014 à 13:35:19 (S | E)
Thank you very much!




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Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais


 


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