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Correction/ lettre de présentation

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Correction/ lettre de présentation
Message de mini-sioux posté le 12-09-2010 à 12:22:07 (S | E | F)
Bonjour!!!
Alors, j'ai un devoir pour demain, il faut que j'écrive une lettre à un américain, en me décrivant, en parlant de ma famille, de mes hobbys, de mon village, de ma maison, de ma nouvelle école, de mon chanteur préféré....

Voilà, ce que j'ai fait:

"Hello, My name is M*****, I'm 15, I'm a small chestnust-haired girl, I live in C****. C*** is a very small village, in Rhône Alpes, near lyon in country. There are only 100 inhabitants. There is a nice church, but no businesses.
I live in a small house like "the small house in the meadow", I haven't Neighbor.
There are only 2 rooms, because I'm a "fille unique", and the Autumn, we can see Roe deer and wild boars at the windows. My parents'name are Yolande and Jean luc, there are florist on market.
This year, I have change school, because I'm sophomore now. I go in A****'s hight school. It's a hight school with Solar panel, it was the first one in France; I have friends there. The hight school is colour scrubs. I live this hight school, but alot of pupils, find it old, and not very nice. After school, I'm crazy about judo, and horse riding. I like too music, my favorite singer is mika.
When school stop, I'm in holiday, I stay at home, because there is a lot of activitys, so we never miss.
Well it's all for now, so bye!
M****** "

Voilà, pouvez vous m'aider s'il vous plait?
Merci d'avance

-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 12-09-2010 12:49
Divers



Réponse: Correction/ lettre de présentation de sheepishly, postée le 12-09-2010 à 13:52:25 (S | E)
Hello, here is what I can say about what you've done.


"Hello, My name is M*****, I'm 15, I'm a small A mon avis on préfèrera 'little' chestnust-haired girl, I live in C****. C*** Répétition... is a very small village, in Rhône Alpes, near Lyon. There are only 100 inhabitants. There is a nice church, but no businesses. Rapport eglise>>Buisness ?!!
I live in a small house like "the small house in the meadow", I haven't Neighbor. Pas de majuscule, orthographe !
There are only 2 rooms, because I'm a "fille unique" only child of course !, and the Autumn, we can see Roe deers and wild boars atprépoition the window. My parents' name are concordance... Either names are or name is Yolande and Jean luc, there are florist pluriel.
This year, I have change school, because I'm sophomore now. I go at A****'s hightorthographe ! school. It's a hight school with Solar panel, it was the first one in France; I have friends there. The hight school is colour scrubs. I love this hight school, but a lot of pupils, findtraduction littéral >> on utilisera 'think' it old, and not very nice. After school, I'm crazy about judo, and horse-riding. I like tooplace music, my favorite singer is mika.
When school stops, I'm in holiday, I stay at home, because there isverbe au pluriel 'activities..' a lot of activitysmodification orthographique, so we never missmiss ?!!.
Well it's all for now, so bye!
M****** "

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 12-09-2010 14:03


Réponse: Correction/ lettre de présentation de mini-sioux, postée le 12-09-2010 à 14:41:02 (S | E)
"Hello, My name is M*****, I'm 15, I'm a little chestnust-haired girl, I live in C****. It's a very small village, in Rhône Alpes, near Lyon. There are only 100 inhabitants. There is a City hall, a nice church, a lot of farms, no school and no businesses.
I live in a small house like "the small house in the meadow", I haven't neighbors .
There are only 2 rooms, because I'm a only child , and the Autumn, we can see Roe deers and wild boars in the window. My parents' names are Yolande and Jean luc, there are florists .
This year, I have change school, because I'm sophomore now. I go at A****'s high school. It's a high school with Solar panel, it was the first one in France; I have friends there. The high school is colour scrubs. I love this high school, but a lot of pupils think it old, and not very nice. After school, I'm crazy about judo, and horse-riding. I like music too, my favorite singer is mika.
When school stops, I'm in holiday, I stay at home, because there are 'activities, so we never bored.
Well it's all for now, so bye!
M****** "

voilà, merci beaucoup, reste-t il des erreurs s'il vous plait?
merci d'avance


Réponse: Correction/ lettre de présentation de mini-sioux, postée le 12-09-2010 à 15:15:43 (S | E)
Voilà quelque modifications, il me reste une ou 2 questions merci encore
Hello, My name is M*****, I'm 15, I'm a small chestnust-haired girl, I live in C****. It is a very small village, in Rhône Alpes, near lyon in the countryside. There are only 100 people. There is a City hall, a nice church, a lot of farms, no school and no businesses.
I live in a small house like "the small house in the meadow" and I haven't got neighbours.
There are only 2 rooms, because I'm an only child and in autumn, we can see Roe deers and wild boars through the windows. My parents'names are Yolande and Jean luc, they are florists on the market.
This year, I have change school because I'm a sophomore now. I go to A**** high school. It's a high school with solar panels, it was the first one in France; I have friends there. The high school is colour scrubs comment dit on couleur brique??????. I like it but a lot of pupils find it old and not very nice. After school, I'm crazy about judo, and horse riding. I like music too. My favorite singer is mika.
When school stops, I'm on holiday, I stay home because there are many activities, so we never bored.
Well, that's all for now, so bye!
M****** "



Réponse: Correction/ lettre de présentation de sheepishly, postée le 12-09-2010 à 15:38:16 (S | E)
Re-bonjour !

Hello, My name is M*****, I'm 15, I'm a small chestnust-haired girl, I live in C****. It is a very small village, in Rhône Alpes, near Lyon, in the countryside. There are only 100 people. There is a city hall (what is it ?), a nice church, a lot of farms, no school and no businesses.
I live in a small house like "the small house in the meadow" and I haven't got neighbours.
There are only 2 rooms, because I'm an only child and in the autumn, we can see Roe deers and wild boars through J'aurais dit 'by' the windows. My parents' names are Yolande and Jean luc, they are florists at the market.
This year, I have change school because I'm a sophomore now. I go to A**** high school. It's a high school with solar panels, it was the first one in France; I have friends there. The high school walls are coloured like brick red is. (Je prospose cela, mais je ne garantie pas la justesse parfaite) I like it but a lot of pupils find it old and not very nice. After school, I'm crazy about judo-ing (-ing après les verbes de préférence), and horse riding. I like music too. My favorite singer is Mika. (capital letter)
When school stops, I'm on holiday, I stay at home because there are many activities, so we never bored.
Well, that's all for now, so bye!
M****** "


Réponse: Correction/ lettre de présentation de mini-sioux, postée le 12-09-2010 à 15:52:50 (S | E)
re-salut

a city hall, c'est un hôtel de ville

après through, j'ai demandé à un professeur, qui m'a dit through

donc pour judo, tu dirais I'm crazy practing judo?????????

pour la couleur brique, je trouve ça vraiment compliqué, pourrait on pas dire plus simplement

Aussi, il faut que je dise que tous les bâtiments sont en forme de triangle

alors on pourrait dire
The buildings are triangular, and brown??????


merci encore


Réponse: Correction/ lettre de présentation de sheepishly, postée le 12-09-2010 à 17:15:48 (S | E)
Hi !

a city hall, plusieurs traductions Lien Internet


D'accord pour 'trough the window'

Je dirais même I'm crazy about judo-ing

La brique est dure, donc l'expression aussi. Je ne pense pas pourvoir faire plus simple.

Triangular buildings are like brick walls. Pourquoi pas ?!!





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